A Long Overdue Date
by Trynia Merin
Summary: Done! Sequel to Two of the Best: DM has a long overdue date with Fifi, and Penfold has been trying to build up the nerve to ask him for advice about dating... particularly a young Hamster from New York!
1. Letter from Fifi

_Disclaimer: Dangermouse and characters are property of Cosgrove/Hall productions, and I don't own them. This fiction and the characters of M6 Lori Lamoure and her assistant and other craziness the other side of the pond is my own insanity, property of me, Trynia Merin. I've been having THIS on my brain forever, and pardon the raw form of this fan fiction._

**A Long Overdue Date**

By Trynia Merin

This story takes place after Two of the Best, and Two of the Worst

* * *

"My dear Cousin," Lori started to write, but was tempted to scratch it out. Bagel looked over her best friend's shoulder to see what she was doing. From the wadded up papers landing in and around the wastepaper basket, it was obvious what was going on.

"DM does have a computer you could use," Bagel said.

"Bagel, do you MIND?" Lori said, waving her friend away. "This is personal."

"You're getting worse every day. These crazy British are having a bad influence on you," Bagel clicked her tongue. "Making you all reserved and stuff."

"Those crazy Brits are paying our salary, remember?" Lori said, pointing at Bagel with her pencil. "And Danger Mouse is CURRENTLY using his computer. Now if you don't' mind I've got a NOTE to write…"

"Why not tell your cousin Fifi in person when you see her?" said Bagel. "After all, writing notes is overrated. Better yet, why not email her?"

"Because I don't have her email, genius?"

"Ask her BOYFRIEND Danger Mouse then," Bagel countered, sticking her tongue out at Lori, who fumed. She danced out of the way, as Lori threw the wadded up note at her, laughing.

"Sheesh, touchy, isn't she?" Penfold asked as he walked in with a pot of tea for the chief, and an apron. Bagel had a similar apron, and she was dusting off the statues and various trophies that Dangermouse had acquired over the years. She insisted on doing her share of house cleaning, as she usually did that duty for Lori back in New York.

"So, what is your CHIEF doing?" the female hamster wondered.

"I'm picking up the cleaning, like," Penfold laughed. "And lookee here, he has the tuxedo washed… tells you something doesn't' it?"

"Well, Lori's writing a letter to her now. She's probably is going to eat crow for fifty bazillion years," Bagel rolled her eyes as she carried the waste paper basked under one arm, and held the feather duster aloft.

"You yanks have the daftest sayings," Penfold laughed.

"No more so then you Brits," said Bagel. "Is that the Chief's… um… what-cha-ma-call-it… tea?"

"That'd be it," Penfold said as he held the tray with Dangermouse's usual Earl Grey hot, with an embroidered tea cozy that Penfold had said his Aunt had made. Alongside instead of digestive were some of Bagel's homemade chocolate brownies.

"You found the brownies," Bagel said. "As if you didn't eat half of them."

"Cor, they WERE half good," Penfold shrugged. "Besides didn't you MAKE them so the chief COULD eat them?"

"Hmm, after I stole the bowl from you," she laughed, flicking dust at him from the feather duster.

"Penfold, where is my tea?" came DM's voice irritated. "And have you picked up the cleaning YET?"

"OH heck," Penfold mumbled. "Coming DM!"

"Oy vey, what's an assistant to do," asked Bagel as Penfold scurried off with Dangermouse's tea in one hand, and the cleaning bag in the other.

Penfold managed to get to Dangermouse by the third yell, as the white wonder was checking his emails on the computer in the study. He placed DM's tray to the left, and without even looking Danger Mouse picked up the hot tea, sipping it delicately with one pinkie extended while he held the saucer in his lap. "I got yer cleaning right enough," Penfold announced, holding up the bag. "Anything else DM?"

"Good show Penfold," said Dangermouse. "And thank you for the brownies."

"Wasn't me Chief," Penfold said, tracing the carpet with his toe. "Was Lori's assistant what made them."

"It is rather nice to have them around, isn't it?" said Dangermouse absently as he sipped his tea.

"DM," Penfold said as he held up the bag.

"Oh just pop that into the bedroom that's a good lad," Dangermouse said as Penfold coughed. Mumbling the hamster took the cleaning bag to Dangermouse's room, before returning a few minutes later.

"Chief?" asked Penfold, standing there with his hands behind his back.

"Yes Penfold?" asked Dangermouse, still nibbling on the rest of his brownie. Bagel did give Penfold a run for his money in the desserts department, he had to admit.

"I was wondering, if you weren't busy. if I might ask you… no, it's silly."

"Ask me what Penfold?" DM said slowly, turning to face his assistant. Although he had a good guess what was on his assistant's mind, he had to be sure to hear it from Penfold first, before possibly embarrassing his friend.

"Well, I was thinking, you going on about having the girls here," said Penfold. "And seeing it's tonight you're going out with… hem… your lady friend."

"What are you on about Penfold?" Dangermouse asked, pretending to be stern.

"I was wondering, if I might ask you some… advice," Penfold stopped, wringing his hands and losing his nerve.

"Regarding what exactly?" the White Wonder enquired.

"You said you'd let me have the night off," Penfold said. "And you had tickets for the concert."

"That I do, in a private box," Dangermouse said. "And we'll be meeting after the show… and no I can't stop by to tuck you in before I get back."

"That's not what I mean DM," Penfold puffed out the breath he was holding. "I mean… um... that is to say…"

"Spit it out man," Dangermouse laughed. "You know there's very little that gets past me."

"Well, it's about M6, and not about M6," he trailed off. "You said you had someone in mind for her?"

Knowing that wasn't' what Penfold was asking, but still humoring his shy assistant, Dangermouse said, "Well Agent 57 had been asking if I knew any possible eligible girls, and there was also Agent 98."

"Go on, she won't know what 57 looks like!" Penfold laughed.

"Well, she did say she wasn't opposed to what the Americans called blind dates… and face it with 57, that's about as blind as one can get," Dangermouse laughed, cocking an eyebrow.

"Since that's squared away," Penfold exhaled in a deep breath before continuing. "I was wondering about her assistant… if she… um…"

"My dear Penfold, are you asking if she has a date?" asked Dangermouse with a knowing smile.

"Er well, that is to say… em," Penfold wrung his hands, wishing he were somewhere else. "I had thought…"

"My dear Penfold, there is nothing WRONG in your asking such things. I mean you ARE entitled to go out once in a while," Dangermouse laughed, standing up and patting his friend on the shoulder. "Why didn't' you come to me about this before?"

"You did say that being a secret agent… makes a social life difficult," Penfold squeaked, very embarrassed.

"She is rather a nice girl, and I'm certain that M6 wouldn't mind."

"I um… er… is it THAT noticeable Chief?" Penfold flushed.

"My dear chap, I have noticed how eager you are to show her your Auntie's recipe for trifle, and how much she enjoys having you taste her… Bubbe is it… chicken soup. Not to mention the macramé plant holder you showed her how to make when she insisted on knitting you a new muffler to replace the one that got lost in our last mission," Dangermouse smiled knowingly. "So if you want my advice, ask the gel out."

"I'm not GOOD at this," Penfold whimpered. "That's why I'm asking you, DM. Can't you ask M6 to ask her for me?"

"Penfold, when matters of the heart and the fair sex are concerned, it's best to stand up and be a man… er… mouse… er make that hamster, and ask her yourself. This is the 21st century… after all," Dangermouse said, patting Penfold's back.

"Were you ever nervous, to ask a girl out?" Penfold looked at Dangermouse.

The White Wonder coughed and looked to the side, wondering how much of his earlier life he should divulge. While he had told Penfold many secrets of his past life, even letting details about Fifi slip, he was reserved when it came to delicate things like a first crush, or a first date. It was just the air of British reserve he was used to maintaining.

"Let me just say this, Penfold," he cleared his throat as he sat down again, and Penfold perched on the nearby stool with interest.

"I have had my share of experiences in dating, and it becomes easier with time. Moreover, asking a young woman to a concert is the perfect start of such an exercise. In addition, I'd recommend giving her something rather nice, like a flower or something she likes. And you're quite good when it comes to sweets, Good Grief you practically have memorized the candy department at the local chemists. and you already know that you two clean well together… so I would say that you have a fair chance this wont' be a disaster."

"Unlike missions?" Penfold groaned.

"Penfold, go in there and ask her, but mind you, take off the apron, and make sure you have a clean suit and tie for tonight. As for the rest, if you EVER need to ask me, please do NOT hesitate," said Danger Mouse.

"Cor, thank you DM," Penfold breathed a sigh of relief as he suddenly tripped over the trashcan on the way out. Dangermouse sighed and shook his head. The boy was definitely going to need some help.

* * *

"No Bubbe, he's a good boy," said Bagel as she spoke into the phone. "Yes, he cooks; he cleans. What's not to like… oy?"

Penfold managed to slip by as he saw her speaking on the phone. She spoke a few words, and then hung up just as he coughed, holding something behind his back. "Ahem."

She jumped a foot out of her skin and landed on the floor, and he looked at her apologetically as she recovered, "You scared six years off of me. what's up?"

"Um well… er that is to say, I was wondering," Penfold said, still wearing his apron, identical to the one that she wore. Suddenly he pulled something from behind his back, and Bagel chuckled to see it was a potted plant, more precisely a potted geranium, with a bow tied around the pot.

"This is for you," he stammered, holding it out, and looking VERY unsure of himself

"Why thank you," she said, taking the pot, and looking at it. "I always DID hate trying to figure out WHAT to put flowers in. This is very thoughtful."

"Um there's something else," he stammered out. "I mean, you can say no if you want to. But I um… there is the concert tonight, and Danger Mouse said that I had the night off as it seems, and well…"

"Are you asking me out?" Bagel smiled sweetly.

"No em… er…" he gasped, mortified. "That is to say… well… er yes I am?"

"I would love to go, out with you," she said with a smile.

"Crikey, thank goodness for that," Penfold breathed a sigh of relief.

"What time and where?" she asked.

"Oh 'eck I haven't thought that out yet," he moaned.

"Well the first part was well done," Bagel smiled. "I've um… gotta check on Lori's gown. She said she needed it ready, and a few sequins fell off it. And you know how those hero types hate not looking their best."

"Er um… the thread and needles… this way,' Penfold said, and quickly dashed to find the sewing kit. He handed it to her, and she laughed, equally flustered as she went off to fix Lori's gown, leaving Penfold almost falling over in a dead faint. She had said yes.


	2. A date for Lori

Disclaimer: Dangermouse and characters are property of Cosgrove/Hall productions, and I don't own them. This fiction and the characters of M6 Lori Lamoure and her assistant and other craziness the other side of the pond is my own insanity, property of me, Trynia Merin. I've been having THIS on my brain forever, and pardon the raw form of this fan fiction.

**A Long Overdue Date**

By Trynia Merin

This story takes place after Two of the Best, and Two of the Worst

* * *

Once Danger Mouse finished checking his emails and composing them, he shut the laptop off with a click. He wandered out of his study with the remains of his afternoon tea in hand, since Penfold had forgotten to clear them away. Down the hall in the main living room, he found Lori scribbling a note to her cousin Fifi like mad.

"Ahem, you seem to be having more trouble writing that note then you have defeating Greenback and Cam Eleon Rex combined," he coughed discreetly.

"Oh Dangermouse," she said with a groan. "What DO you say to a cousin you haven't see in close to 10 years, who's love live isn't ANYTHING like it was when she last described it to me."

"Well, just tell her the truth," Dangermouse said slowly, glancing around for any nosy parkers.

"Penfold's in his room, and I think Bagel's run off to hers," said Lori, her enhanced hearing, courtesy of the latest in American secret service cybernetic technologies, could tell.

"Well, just be honest," Dangermouse said softly, sitting down next to the American agent. Since she was the cousin of his ladylove, he began to look at her as family, quite possibly. Not those things had progressed to THAT point with Fifi… but soon… maybe.

"I feel like such an idiot," Lori sighed, twisting a lock of her blonde hair around her finger nervously. She wore a white exercise suit; similar in style to Dangermouse's except for the M6 logo over her right breast, and the blue piping down the arms and legs. Not to mention her curvaceous body was well flattered by the suit. Any agent would be glad to ask this girl out on a date, and he hoped she wouldn't mind the agent he had in mind, one of his old colleagues.

"Well she explained the whole situation to me," Dangermouse said in a whisper. "She always did know you wanted to be a singer. Before well, you decided to become a secret agent like your father."

"Hercule was the best, and so was my mom," Lori said softly, sighing as she looked at the White Wonder. "Did you ever have the chance to work with them? I know my mom was an American agent, and she met my father on a mission, when he was working for the French/Canadian secret service."

"Actually, I might have crossed paths with M4, your mum, and G26, your dad," Dangermouse said slowly. "But you have to understand that was YEARS ago, when I myself was just a rookie agent… and a lad. During that nastiness with Dr. Crumhorn, and the first time we encountered Baron Greenback."

"I wish they had told me they were agents," she whispered. "Then perhaps… I wouldn't have…"

"I read your file, if you don't' mind me mentioning so," Dangermouse said, resting a hand on her shoulder. Lori wiped away tears. "And if I'm not mistaken, Fifi was one of the few people in your family who knew of your desire to be a secret agent. when she and I… resumed contact; she told me about the young mouse who wanted to be an agent, and the fact that she admired your spirit. It was very difficult for her when you chose to enter the Service after your unfortunate accident."

"Which ended my singing career," she said softly, but memories stirred and she felt the whole story spilling out of her, although she knew that if Dangermouse had read her file he must know already. "I grew up in a circus DM. Mom and Dad… shortly after they had me. It was on some mission. And there was a big explosion… and well… I grew up for years not knowing they were alive, and in fact part of the witness protection program. Still acting as TOP-level agents. Do you have any idea what it's like to suddenly meet your parents when you're a teenager?"

"Well, I might have SOME idea," Dangermouse coughed. "And I do gather from reading your file, that it must not have been easy for you."

"JP isn't just my control agent," she said softly. "He knew my adoptive family. How I grew up adopted in that circus, because I had good athletic abilities at the orphanage. How I became a trapeze artist with the flying Vallendez Squirrels, and how I wanted to be a singer."

"Hmmm yes, I recall. You and your friends in the circus, Redford Roberts, and the young GR Bill. the band you formed… and how you traveled the world singing as an act of your own when you were just teenagers," he said, and then winced. "But your choice of music wasn't exactly… my taste."

"I know how you stand on rock," she laughed. "But what can you expect out of several 15 year old rodents?"

"But as a CIRCUS act?" the White Wonder laughed. "The Radical rodents, performing in CLOWN makeup as part of a three ring act? It doesn't exactly make Top of the Pops, you know…"

"I guess that's why Fifi and I were so close for so many years. We met when we were just young mice. the orphanage tracked her family down in France as my only living relatives. And when the circus traveled abroad in Europe, I met them for the first time. After that we kept touch… until… shortly before that horrible plane crash."

"When you were sixteen," Dangermouse added carefully. "And shortly after Fifi told you about her, and me."

"She WAS about five years older than me," Lori said, amazed at how open Dangermouse was being with her. "And she told me the whole story how you two had met. and how you left, and broke her heart."

"It was because she was family to two well-known agents," Danger Mouse reminisced. "At the time we were in the midst of a mission. And well… I told her that her Uncle Hercule was still alive. She couldn't believe it at first, but I had broken a major rule of etiquette, I had shared classified information with a civilian. She couldn't believe that I knew they were still alive, when she presumed her Uncle was dead. Because of that breach, I was asked to make her swear to secrecy. And for a long time, she couldn't forgive me for asking her to keep such a secret from the rest of her family."

"And that's why she never wrote to me, much more about you."

"She had taken a major risk telling you about me at all," Danger Mouse admitted. "And then I did what I could to make it right, contacting her parents through Colonel K."

"They claimed they never knew I was alive, till they heard about the plane crash," Lori said softly. "But I later found out they DID know I was alive all along. and they never came after me."

"I'm sorry Lori," the White Wonder apologized. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders as she cried. "If I had known, perhaps I might have done something, but the rules were different back then."

"All I can remember was being in that hospital room and being told I'd never walk again," Lori said. "And never be able to hear, and then I saw them… my parents, alive and well. They said that I had a choice: to walk again by the miracles of secret service experimental technology… and never see my circus family again, or go back to my life, as a disabled person."

"Lori…"

"How could I choose differently DM?" she asked, with tears in her eyes. "And why did they make me make such a heartless decision, didn't' they CARE about me?"

"It was the Cold War then," Dangermouse said helplessly.

"I never spoke to them after that," she whispered. "And I couldn't contact my family in the circus again. Therefore, I just… tried to put the past behind me… and focus on the new legs and tail, and ears that science gave me, and I forgot. I just wish I had a real family."

"I didn't mean to dredge up an unpleasant past," Dangermouse apologized, giving her a comforting embrace. "I may be the world's greatest secret agent, but in terms of delicate matters o the past, I must admit I am a washout. When all I meant to do was to tell you that Fifi is delighted to meet you, and catch you up about your family."

"The rules allow it?" she asked him.

"Well, let's just say that they relaxed them recently, because many agents were complaining about how lonely they were. Penfold here, well when he came to work for me, they had bent the rules enough to allow his family to visit when they liked. Provided they were sworn to secrecy. And well, since my adventures were well known, I was one of the FIRST secret agents who was known to the general public," Dangermouse chuckled nervously. "Colonel K thought it was a good PR experiment."

"Great," she laughed; wiping away tears as Dangermouse handed her the box of tissues from the table. "Lousy timing."

"Fifi also kept in touch with your parents," he said softly. "And I do think that she has a message for you from them, since you cutoff contact from them. And I think it would mean a lot to her and them if you read it."

"Are they alive or dead?' she asked.

"She'll tell you tonight," Dangermouse said mysteriously. "And since it's your family affair, I think it wise. Considering I made a hash of the whole situation just now… causing a rather nasty load of old memories to surface, that her delicacy might be better in this matter."

"You didn't mess things up DM," she said, looking at him. "You're probably the closest thing I have to family now, as crazy as it sounds. You and my cousin that is."

"I wouldn't go that far," he laughed nervously.

"I didn't have many people to look up to. The RATS became my next family… after I joined. And then when I met Bagel and was assigned with her as my assistant, they HAD changed the rules enough since I first joined, and I was able to meet her family."

"Hence your immersion to the delights of close knit hamster families?"

"I wondered WHAT had made them change the rules so quickly," she said slowly. "To let assistant agents have such close contact with their families, and JP told me it had something to do with them following the British example."

"Even IF they hadn't, Penfold's family are such a lot of… timid folk they'd be too scared to tell whatever secrets Penfold's let slip. And he's too frightened to even tell his own Aunt about half the things we've encountered," Dangermouse chuckled.

"In other words his cowardice is a good deterrent?" she laughed.

"As far as his family knows, I'm some glorified super hero, and he's my housekeeper and valet, and close friend," Dangermouse laughed. "A bit unfair perhaps, but not too far from the truth."

"He's also your family in a way," Lori said with a smile. "I mean he IS one of your best friends, and he's like a little brother… an ANNOYING little brother."

"I hadn't thought of it like that, which brings me to another matter, which should change this rather unpleasant subject," Dangermouse said. "I took the liberty of procuring you and your assistant tickets for tonight's show. Fifi insisted, and before you and she are to reunite, I thought it would be a good night off for all involved to enjoy the concert."

"She would love that," Lori smiled. "Whenever I WOULD buy tickets to see her in concert or try to contact her, something inextricably went wrong, and I always had to go save the world!"

"Funny coincidence that," said DM, rubbing his chin. "This brings me to the matter of your assistant. Apparently you've observed rather bizarre behavior, bordering on madness from Penfold as of late, and your assistant?"

"Since I don't know Penfold's normal reactions, how would I know better?" she laughed.

"He's unusually bold when it comes to certain things. Such as the fact that he claims he single-handedly rescued her from sudden danger," Dangermouse laughed. "And that's NOT in Penfold's nature. He's a self confessed coward."

"I take it he has a Jones on Bagel then?" Lori laughed. "I can't believe it! A welsh hamster has the hots for my assistant, a New York City gal!"

"Which leads me to my next point," he chuckled, unable to hide his amusement. "This is the first date he's ever been on, and he's going to be nervous."

"And you're asking if I can chaperone?" she laughed. "Bagel IS younger than me, but they ARE both adults. However, on second thought, they both are rather kids at heart. and she's not exactly experienced at dates either, and you're nominating ME?"

"I will be… preoccupied," DM hesitantly admitted. "And in such matters I might not have all my wits about me, considering the circumstances."

"So, I play chaperone to a pair of nervous neurotic love sick hamsters?" Lori laughed. "You really DO have it in for me, don't you?"

"I did take the further liberty of setting you up with one of my co agents, on a sort of date. I do hope you don't mind."

"Who is it?" she asked.

"Well, let's just say he's a master of disguise," he cleared his throat. "Personal relationships are difficult for him normally, because from one time to the next, he tends to change appearance. And seeing you are a master of unmasking criminals who are masters of disguise like Cam Elion, I figured it would be a good match…"

"So who or WHAT is he?" she asked.

"He goes by Agent 57," DM answered.

"Great, not just a BLIND date, but a REAL blind date," Lori laughed. "Seriously, you ARE a glutton for punishment when THIS night is over."

"You don't mind, do you? It would mean terribly much to him. He does tend to get lonely… as we all do."

"Sure I'll take out your friend, or since we're in Reserved England, where SOME social customs are backwards, I'll let him take me out. But you SURE you're not getting me into some crazy misadventure?" she chuckled.

"My dear Lori, you know how the lives of secret agents tend to get… complicated," he coughed knowingly.

"All right, you're on," she said. "What's the time and date?"

"I'll be driving us all out in the Mark III to the Albert Hall," Dangermouse said. "At eight o'clock sharp. In addition, we'll meet up with your date there. And then the relaxation, I HOPE will begin."

"Sounds like it will be SOME night to remember, between babysitting hamsters and dating MR. Mysterious," Lori grinned. "You do have an interesting circle of friends Dangermouse."

"Quite," Dangermouse laughed. "And now I trust we shall commence preparations, for operation Night off."

"Spot on," she said, copying the White Wonder's British expression. "This mission should we choose to accept it, and if we're captured I'm going to disavow ALL knowledge of it."

"I rather think that's the wrong show," he groaned at her bad joke.

* * *

By the time Bagel finished sewing on the missing sequins, she took the gown to Lori. After showing it to her friend she planned too scuttle off to find something for herself to wear. However Lori stopped her friend and said, "This looks great! Thanks!"

"Anytime," she nodded. "You know you could learn a thing or two about home repair."

"I know how to fix a toaster, a washing machine and a coffee maker," Lori teased. "Thank you very much… when you grow up in a circus…"

"Not THAT story again," Bagel groaned, handing the gown to Lori, with a look that clearly meant "Don't go there…" because she had heard the war stories of Lori's unusual child hood far more times then she could count. Not that she didn't like hearing them, but sometimes when your mind was on something else, it was difficult to be distracted by advice or old flights down Memory Lane.

"Now what's eating you," she asked. "As if I HAVE to ask."

"Just um, well unsure of what's going to happen tonight, that's all," Bagel confessed, looking a bit awkward.

"Just a date, silly. And if Dangermouse has some twisted sense of humor in fixing me up with a master of disguise I promise you he'll be hearing no end of it from me for the next few weeks."

"Who is he?"

"Agent 57. I took a quick look through DM's files, and the guy can literally disguise himself as anyone and anything."

"So if the jukebox or the local soda machine waltzes up to you and asks you to sit with him, you'll know who it is?" Bagel said wryly.

"Get outta here," Lori said with a grin. "Not LITERALY. We still have to pick an outfit for you to wear."

"Since it's a concert, well I'm guessing tuxedos are out, and formal gowns," said Bagel as Lori held up the blue gown, which came to just above the knees to show off her shapely 

legs. It had spaghetti straps and small rows of sequins, not overly formal, but a few steps above other outfits.

"Well it's not ROCK, and it's not pop, necessarily. My cousin's going to be doing her greatest hits backed up by the London Animal philharmonic."

"Albert hall basement for us then," Bagel stuck out her tongue. "Never mind that we could sneak in and see the humans."

"And get stepped on or squished, no thank you, I'd rather face the elephant tamers during feeding time, thank you very much," Lori returned as she lay the gown down on her bed, and selected the right length half slip to go with it. Unlike some modern girls, she preferred to wear slips with any skirt.

"Okay, I'll leave you to primp and fluff," Bagel said, backing slowly out as if she was trying to escape.

"No way, not so fast, you get to have some sisterly advice," Lori said, her telescopic tail snaking out and grabbing Bagel's wrist to pull her back into the room. "You won't get out of here without it."

"Great, substitute one secret agent mouse for two sisters at home in the Big Apple, and I get the whole darn 'here's what we do and don't do on a first date…' talk," Bagel rolled her eyes as Lori pulled her to sit on the other side of the bed, not covered by her gown.

"Now, we should find you something classy yet…"

"Give me a break," Bagel rolled her eyes. "Usually I'm the one giving YOU fashion advice. I got a suggestion for you Sis, why not let me pick a few outfits and then you tell me yes or forget it."

"All right, you win," Lori relented as she released her assistant's wrist, and saw her scurry off to the other guestroom in Dangermouse's Mayfair pillar-box.

Finally the young hamster girl reached the safety of her own room, and chuckled nervously. She opened the sizable closet, filled with outfits that had been shipped over Fed Ex from the penthouse post office box apartment in New York, and sighed. What to wear, what to wear. When she first heard Fifi Lamoure would be doing a concert she had assumed that it would be T-shirt and jeans time, but no such luck. Fortunately, she found a rather nice blouse and skirt combo, and tossed it down, then tried other things. By the time she'd reached five outfits laying on the bed, Lori came in, wearing her blue gown and a pair of white stockings and moderate heeled shoes. She had not done her hair or makeup yet, and Bagel sighed as she sat on the bed.

"Hard choices?" she asked.

"You guessed it," she mumbled. "This wardrobe sometimes puts the F in FRUMP! I look like a parochial school girl gone amuck. When I was in public school in NYC, nobody gave a DARN if I wore jeans and a button up oxford, or if I showed up in a casual skirt and top. But take Mother and a few hundred dollars shopping for 'work clothes' and it's ALL about 'dressing the part'… sheesh!"

"Well, maybe I could suggest something," Lori suggested. "If you don't' mind."

"Go for it, the only good stuff is what I'd wear for a wedding or bar mitzvah," Bagel sighed as Lori began to pick up her friend's garments and toss a few here and there. Bagel knew it would be a while so she plugged in the hair straightening iron to heat up, and opened her box of makeup.

* * *


	3. Fifi and DM together again!

Disclaimer: Dangermouse and characters are property of Cosgrove/Hall productions, and I don't own them. This fiction and the characters of M6 Lori Lamoure and her assistant and other craziness the other side of the pond is my own insanity, property of me, Trynia Merin. I've been having THIS on my brain forever, and pardon the raw form of this fan fiction.

**A Long Overdue Date**

By Trynia Merin

This story takes place after Two of the Best, and Two of the Worst

* * *

"Penfold, DO try to get a move on," Dangermouse called as he fastened his cufflinks. He cut a dashing figure in a black tuxedo with red cummerbund and bowtie, not to mention the custom Dangermouse cufflinks. Picking up a rose from the fridge, he pinned it on his lapel like a boutonniere, then remembered he had to leave Fifi's corsage in until they were just about to leave.

"All right DM," Penfold mumbled. "Just a moment like."

"Penfold what ARE you doing?" asked Dangermouse as he walked into the bedroom and saw his assistant ironing his shirt and jacket. He was in his suit and apron still, ironing like crazy on a nice semiformal black tuxedo that he'd last worn for the Secret Agent awards banquet in January.

"Ironing me shirt and trousers, what does it look like Chief?" Penfold looked up; a big flustered as clouds of steam flew up around him and the portable ironing board.

"More like a sauna, Penfold. Honestly, you should have done this before you knew."

"Oh crumbs chief, I don't want wrinkles."

"But ironing your PANTS and your socks?" Dangermouse groaned.

"Might as well finish the washing up," he shrugged, as Dangermouse sighed at the other accumulated laundry, nicely folded in piles on Penfold's bed. Whenever Penfold was agitated, the most he'd either eat or do cleaning like a neat freak.

"Penfold you give a new meaning to the word overwrought," Dangermouse sighed as he strode up to his friend and sat down on the bed. "This is NOT Greenback we are going up against…"

"Might as well be. Cor… it isn't half as scary as this. What if I say something BALMY or I sweat in me chair? Wouldn't do, you know."

"What won't do, is you being LATE," Dangermouse said, tapping his watch as he shook his head. "Now come on, it isn't as nearly as much an ordeal for us as it is for the ladies."

"Too right," Penfold sighed with relief. "I had forgotten hehehe."

"Now come on, let's get you ready."

"I can dress myself you know, I'm not THAT far gone, Chief," Penfold groaned.

"I'll just be out in the study till you're ready. Sing out," the White Wonder said as he turned around, and then hesitated. Seeing Penfold slowly mucking about with polishing a pair of his best shoes he softened, and returned.

"Oh err, got to make 'em so I can see me face," Penfold mumbled to himself as he got black shoe polish on his hands as he worked hard with a shoe shining kit tucked under his bed.

"Penfold, look, do try and relax," Dangermouse said as he sat on the bed by his friend. "It will be all right, trust me…"

"If you say so DM," Penfold looked up at him.

"I know so," Dangermouse said. "One day you'll look back on this and have a good laugh. That's it. now anything else you want to ask me?"

"Er no. Except for what tie would best go with me suit."

"Penfold you already KNOW, you have it RIGHT there with the rest," Dangermouse laughed as he saw Penfold's dress suit hanging neatly pressed.

"Oh er… right," Penfold chuckled. "I'd forget me head if it weren't on me neck."

"Look, I do want you to at least TRY to enjoy yourself," Dangermouse said softly, patting his friend's shoulder. "And I'm certain you will be all right, provided you don't end up chewing your nails again…"

"Mmm that's the worst of me worries, DM," Penfold groaned.

"Then you're doing well already, see. Look I'll go get your boutonniere and corsage you picked out. Then when you're ready, come out and meet me. And if there are any OTHER things… do not hesitate to ask…" Dangermouse added with a knowing wink.

"Chief… DM… thanks… ever so much," Penfold said with a rather sincere look. Dangermouse smiled and patted him on the head.

"My pleasure. Now hurry up. Mustn't keep the ladies waiting."

* * *

Penfold finally finished preening and joined his Chief out in the living room area. He looked very sharp in his black suit with a blue bowtie, and his shoes were so shiny DM could see himself in them with great ease. Leaning down, Dangermouse straightened his friend's tie and took the boutonniere to pin on his lapel. It reminded him of days long ago when his mother pinned a flower on his jacket for his first dance. The White Wonder shook the memory from his mind and waited as Penfold brushed any remaining lint off himself and Dangermouse with a clothes brush.

"Very spiffy indeed," Dangermouse nodded. "Now… the ladies. Give them an extra hour I should say?"

"Usually, crikey me MUM would take FOREVER." Penfold sighed. "And me auntie, although she DID have to put her face on, her teeth in, and get her curls set."

"Shall we do a spot of reading then?" DM suggested as he sat down. "And perhaps could you mix me a dry martini. Not that I shall be intoxicated whilst driving… but since we do have time."

After shifting to get comfortable the White Wonder held up the daily mirror. While he slowly leafed through it, Penfold went to the small sideboard and started tinkering about with bottles. He then rushed off to the kitchen to get some ice in the silver ice bucket, and a clean pair of tongs. While he was there, he opened up the fridge and took out the milk, and then stepped on the step stool to grab the vanilla iced cream from its place tucked away. Added to that was some chocolate syrup and two tall glasses. He rapidly made two ice cream sodas, and stuck the other one in the fridge, then hurried back with his soda and Dangermouse's ice for his drink.

"Hmm," the White Wonder mumbled as he perused the paper. "Not exactly FRONT page advertising… like she deserves. I'm going to have to write that twit of an editor a testimonial."

"Are we ready to blast off?" came Lori's voice, and Dangermouse almost jumped out of his chair, tossing down his paper.

"Good grief, already?" he asked, turning his head to see Lori standing there transformed. He looked at her appreciatively in the short blue sequined gown with matching high heels, and her hair long and straight around her shoulders. IT shone with a glossy sheen, accentuating her dark lashes and soft pink eyes. She had been transformed from tomboyish agent into a glamorous woman, and Dangermouse saw the resemblance between her and her cousin.

"Hey, looking pretty James Bond-ish, aren't you?" she asked him with a smile.

"I must say you look quite lovely," Dangermouse commented with a smile as he went over and gave her hand a gallant kiss. "Enough to be the belle of the ball… if we were going to one that is."

"Cor, yer gorgeous Lori," said Penfold, holding his soda and blinking at the vision in blue. "If I do say so meself."

"Where's your counterpart?" asked DM.

"Putting her finishing touches on," Lori smiled knowingly. A nice set of blue eye shadow with sparkle dust highlighted her eyelids, with just a touch of lip-gloss, and her pink ears shimmered with the dust as well. She wore a string of pearls and a golden locket, with initials on it.

"Oh I HATE wearing heels, good thing I brought my platforms," Bagel mumbled as she strode out, almost tripping. Dangermouse and Penfold turned to see her coming down the stairs, and Penfold drained his ice cream soda in a single gulp to stop the lump in his throat.

She had gone with the pink gown. It was floor length, and shimmery pink with lace on the bottom, and off the shoulder puffed sleeves. The neckline was a scoop neck, and she wore her brown hair back in a single bow tied around her bobbed hair. The pink platform Mary Jane's put her a few inches taller than Penfold, and her golden fur shimmered a bit with some of Lori's diamond dust. A light purple eye shadow and a bit of lip-gloss added to her charm, and she had been transformed from bookworm into a rather lovely girl. She wore a silver star of David pendant amongst a string of pearls, and a matching gold wristwatch Lori had gotten her for her birthday earlier that year.

"Oh crikey," Penfold got out. She was pretty. No doubt.

"Hey," Bagel said. "We clean up well don't we?"

"I'll say, oh crumbs I'll said, wow," Penfold managed to stammer out.

"Don't just stand there like a stick, Penfold, don't you remember your manners. would you ladies care for a little something to drink before the show?" Dangermouse asked, snapping Penfold out of his trance. It seemed like both hamsters were admiring the other with strange schoolgirl/schoolboy innocence, not looking one another in the eyes.

"You've got a milk moustache," Bagel chuckled at Penfold.

"Er um, would you care for one. I mean… a milkshake?"

"Um sure," Bagel nodded eagerly. "Chocolate or vanilla?"

"Lori?" Dangermouse asked.

"If you're having a martini, I'm driving the Mark III,' Lori said as she saw Penfold holding Dangermouse's drink.

"Quite," Dangermouse nodded slowly, knowing the American's caution for driving under the influence. "I'll call out the directions. Thank you Penfold."

Penfold absently handed DM his martini, and dashed into the kitchen. Bagel cast them a worried look, and Dangermouse held up a hand indicating it should be fine. He sipped his drink, and turned to Lori, who said, "I'll just have a diet coke."

"Penfold, please fetch a diet soda for Lori, while you're out there," he said. There was a long silence, and Bagel bit her lip, thinking the poor guy was scared to death.

"Wait here a minute, shan't be too long," Dangermouse said as he put down his drink and wandered out to check on Penfold. His little friend was standing in front of the fridge, nervously putting ice cream into his glass and taking the other out.

"Oh crikey DM… I'm terrified!"

"Penfold, it's all right," Dangermouse said, slowly understanding. "I'll be there the whole time… and so will Lori and Agent 57… now do try to calm down."

"Yes, calm… must be calm," Penfold said robotically, taking both glasses out with him. "Oh crumbs, oh crikey, oh HECK!"

"Poor chap," Dangermouse sighed as he realized Penfold had forgotten Lori's soda. He opened the fridge, grabbed a can, and then reached for a glass and some ice. He put a twist 

of lemon on the side and walked out to see Penfold slowly handing the glass to Bagel, who smiled.

"This is GREAT. I could show you a great egg cream recipe."

"Egg cream?" Penfold said, nervous. "Err… hang about. There's something else."

"Thank you DM," Lori said as Dangermouse handed her the glass of soda, and held up his drink. Penfold returned with something in a plastic box and handed it shyly to Bagel.

"Thank you," she said, taking it as Penfold fumbled with the elastic band on the corsage, and slid it up her wrist. HE noticed her hand was shaking as much as his.

"Right yes, be calm," he stammered.

"A toast, to a long overdue night off," Dangermouse held up his glass. All four of them held up their drinks and clinked them. Penfold spilled a bit of his but luckily, it landed on the floor before he and Bagel drained their sodas in a single gulp.

"Now, shall we?" Dangermouse asked as he offered his arm to Lori, and led her to the stairs.

"No lift?" Penfold asked.

"We'll take the stairs. Mustn't have the ladies mess up their lovely looks, can we now?" DM said as Lori took his arm.

"Ooh thank heaven for that!" said Penfold. "Um… shall we go?"

"Let's go," Bagel said, and took his hand as he stumbled off after Dangermouse and Lori. They steadied each other and as Penfold felt her hand in his he realized it was just as sweaty as his was.

This time Lori sat behind the wheel of the Mark III, and the White Wonder sat in the passenger seat. He was merely trying to humor her, and he glanced in the rear view mirror at Penfold and Bagel who sat discretely apart in the backseat extension. He called out the directions to Lori, who handled his car beautifully. If it had been any other American, he would have put his foot down. However, he did have to admit drinking and driving with ANY amount of alcohol was not wise.

"Hang a left here… and pull up round the front, that's a good gel," Dangermouse nodded as she pulled up to the valet parking.

"Where is this agent 57 anyway?" Lori asked. "I'm going to think you stood me up… or he did."

"You'll see," Dangermouse said as he climbed out and opened the door for Lori. He then folded down the seat and Penfold hopped out, offering his hand for his date. At least he was starting to gather his wits about him, although he looked petrified, Dangermouse sighed.

* * *

Other mice and various animals were gathering by their version of the Albert hall, in the basement as their vehicles pulled up. Cats, dogs, birds, and others walked arm in arm, all with their evening ware on. The males were resplendent in their tuxedos, as were the females with their hair couiffured or pomaded or even stick straight, as was the fashion that year.

"Ah, mind you take care of that," Dangermouse said to the valet who nodded. To his shock, the car actually drove itself into the parking spot for a VIP in the garage. He took Lori's arm as Penfold nervously did the same, trying desperately to 'keep a stiff upper lip', as Dangermouse would tell him. As for Bagel, she tried her best not to trip, for she had been on precious few dates, and the last time she had been anywhere with this many tuxedos had been a family wedding two years ago.

"Where is Agent 57?" Bagel asked.

"Eh?" Penfold snapped out of his trance as Dangermouse walked up to the box office once they went inside past the security.

"Mmm," Dangermouse mumbled. "Any ideas Lori?"

"Hmm," She tapped her chin, glancing around for anything that looked out of place.

"Agent 57?" asked Penfold as he started glancing at the large billboard, and then taping the bronze rope railings.

"Don't' be silly Penfold," Dangermouse sighed as he got the tickets, and tucked them into his inner pocket. He moved over and started glancing around; walking up to a soda machine that seemed out of place.

"Oh boy,' Bagel mumbled as she saw him talking to it.

"Ah there you are old sport," he said.

"Um chief," said Penfold.

"Not now," Dangermouse said. "I want to introduce you to M6."

Lori started to giggle. For someone had moved up and slowly coughed, and she turned to see who it was. He looked remarkably similar to the White Wonder, except he was a gray mouse, and he wore a rather nice tuxedo. "Don't' hang about man, I know you're shy,' Dangermouse said to the soda machine.

"What's DM doing chatting up a soda machine?" the newcomer whispered in her ear.

"I don't know. He seems to think it's a colleague, my date."

"I rather think that'd be boring, what, talking to a vending machine all night, not to mention the odd looks you'd get,' said the stranger. She looked at him and smiled.

"M6," she said, holding out her hand. The gray mouse wearing the sunglasses kissed it. It was odd how he looked like he could be DM's brother.

"Ah, pleased to meet you," he said with a smile. "I've heard so much about you."

"Really?" she asked.

"Um, DM…" said Penfold, noticing Lori's conversation partner. "DANGER MOUSE!"

"Penfold do shush," Dangermouse said, and then stopped short. "Well I'll be."

"You always were a bit slow on the uptake, DM," smiled the newcomer.

"Agent 57, but you look like…" Dangermouse trailed off.

"Your younger brother?" he chuckled. "I needed SOMETHING which would suit the occasion of this lovely lady."

Lori blushed as he kissed her hand again, and said, "So you're DM's brother, or a reasonable copy?"

"I'm known for facsimile," he smiled. "And you don't mind me borrowing a relative's likeness do you now, DM?"

"Not at all," Dangermouse said with a slow smile. "It's rather flattering. He'd be rather pleased, if he were here."

"OH," Lori said, as 57 apologized.

"So sorry old chum," said 57. "I bally forgot."

"No matter," the White Wonder said, and shook his friend's hand. "I'm glad you could make it. Now shall we go in before the show?"

"Quite," nodded agent 57, offering Lori his arm. She slid hers into it, and followed Dangermouse in. Penfold and Bagel shrugged, their awkwardness forgotten as they began to giggle, and he took her hand in his. It didn't' seem so hard when the focus was off them for now.


	4. 57's first kiss in ages

__

Disclaimer: Dangermouse and characters are property of Cosgrove/Hall productions, and I don't own them. This fiction and the characters of M6 Lori L'Amour and her assistant and other craziness the other side of the pond is my own insanity, property of me, Trynia Merin. I've been having THIS on my brain forever, and pardon the raw form of this fanfiction. 

****

A Long Overdue Date

__

Part 4

By Trynia Merin

This story takes place after Two of the Best, and Two of the Worst 

**********************************************************

They entered DM's private reserved box, which was really a box, a cigar box to be precise. Inside there were six nicely padded seats, and DM took the one with the closest view of the stage, while Penfold sat down next to him, after waiting nervously for Bagel to sit beside him. The last two were where 57 and Lori sat. They all glanced at the patrons filing in below, and into the private boxes. DM took a program that was handed to him, and skimmed over it. The others didn't' bother, and Bagel even started to draw doodles on hers, while Penfold slipped a comic book out of his pocket and put it into the middle of his program to secretly read it as they waited for the lights to dim. Finally they were all seated, and the lights dropped. Bagel heard a nervous mumbling from Penfold who hated the dark, and was trying to read his comic with the aid of a small pen sized flashlight. Lori craned her neck over the seat back to see the stage, and 57 tapped her shoulder.

"Try these, M6 and you'll get a jolly good look at the stage," he whispered and handed them to her. She smiled and held up a pair of high tech spy binoculars, which made perfect opera glasses.

"Thanks," she whispered to 57 who was watching the stage in rapt interest. He had taken off the shades, and was holding a second pair of ultra secret spy goggles to his face so he could see as the conductor, a rather shaggy mane lion came up and bowed as everyone applauded. The orchestra came into the pit, and the curtain rose as the band accompanying the main act came into view with a pastel colored backdrop. Then a spotlight shone on a tall slender mouse, with silky white fur and long blonde hair, done up in an ornate bun on the top of her head, and topped by a gold costume tiara. DM stood transfixed as she stood before the microphone in a green dress, emerald in shade. She wore long silk green gloves to match, with diamond bracelets, and an emerald pendant around her long willowy neck. When the orchestra cued, she began to sing a selection of her popular soft pop ballads, as well as notable opera numbers.

Throughout the whole thing, the audience was transfixed by her voice. Lori gazed at her cousin through her spy binoculars and smiled, wiping away a tear. That could have been her up there, but for a twist of fate. Noticing her sad mood, Agent 57 couldn't help but reach over and take her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. She turned to look at him with a small smile on her face. Penfold had stopped reading his comic surreptitiously, and so did Bagel stop her doodling. She glanced at Fifi L'Amour with great interest. Even the opera numbers were rendered interesting. She had the audience in the palm of her hand as she continued, and received a standing ovation at the end of the concert's first half.

"We'd best get a move on," DM said quickly. "I'll take you back, so you can meet on her break, in the dressing room…"

"Don't bother DM. I'm sure I can find the way," Lori laughed. "And you'll have her all to yourself at the end…"

Penfold started to giggle madly, and DM said, "Penfold, SHUSH…"

"I do wonder WHY he's so uptight about that… is it a British thing?" asked Bagel as she looked at Penfold.

"Cor yes, it is, right enough, you guessed it!" Penfold giggled. "And he's got PLENTY of practice keepin' secrets… and DM is as British as the British come…"

"Is that why you were wearing cotton in your ears yesterday… Because when I asked you about where the coffee was and you thought I said toffee," Bagel asked. "To keep yourself from hearing him talk in his sleep?"

"Crikey no, it's cause the chief snores…" Penfold giggled back.

"Is THAT what I hear sometimes late at night… I thought it was a top-secret device he was testing…"

"I don't USUALLY sleep," DM said sullenly. "And I'll have you know SOME of us like to keep some details of our lives PRIVATE… like what certain stuffed BEAR you like to sleep with?"

"I sleep with a stuffed raccoon," Bagel said as Penfold put a hand over his face.

"I'll be happy to escort you backstage, Ma'am," said 57, and he offered Lori his arm. She smiled and nodded to DM, who was left giving Penfold a rather hard glare from his one golden eye, his arms folded across his chest. Bagel and Penfold exchanged looks and each would erupt into a fit of giggles alternatively.

"When you've QUITE finished," DM said annoyedly. 

"I'm sorry DM," Bagel said slowly. "I didn't mean…"

"Sorry DM," Penfold stifled his laugh behind his hand. "Pardon, it just… sort of popped out…"

"Give him a break, please?" Bagel asked, putting on her best pouting face.

"Oh very well. I'll go and get some refreshments for the pair of you, if you promise to behave yourselves. Do try not to wander off… or anything silly this time Penfold. Because last time you got locked in the broom closet thinking it was the entrance to the box!"

"Oh heck all right DM," Penfold mumbled. Bagel watched as DM got up and left them to their own devices.

"What comic are you reading?" Bagel leaned over.

"Er… emmm that would be one of those Japanese ones…" Penfold mumbled.

"Ohhh, I LOVE manga," Bagel smiled. "I see you like the Ranma ½ book! That's one of my favorites!"

"Go on… some chap turnin into a gel when he falls into cold water, and then he gets right by hot… isn't it balmy, and a right cut up?" Penfold laughed hysterically. "If I threw cold water on DM he'd be EVER so cross…"

"Well Yu-gi-Oh's another one I like reading…" Bagel said.

"A lot of fancy card tricks, and it's a might bit creepy, but at least it's just fiction… right. Nothing like that could EVER happen in real life… and that's why I can stands to read it… like," Penfold chuckled, glancing at Ranma falling into a swimming pool only to be transformed once more.

"Poor idiot, he doesn't know what hit him…"

"Crikey, he doesn't half have enough birds running after him cause his dad promised to marry him to them… poor bloke Mousse though… wish he'd get the girl Shampoo… love the names though… cor… wonder where Gel and Tonic are?"

***

"You said that you used DM's brother's likeness as a disguise?" Lori asked Agent 57 as they walked through the maze of backstage past orchestra members resting.

"Hem, well it was an unfortunate choice… because it does tend to remind him of a rather… tragic accident…" said 57 with a cough.

"How so?"

"Just between you and me and the lamppost…" said 57. "DM's brother also was an agent… but he disappeared under mysterious circumstances. One of Greenback's most nefarious plots, a doorway which could send him ANYWHERE in the world if he had a picture of it, to feed into the blasted thing…" said 57. "It was stolen from Dr. Squarkenkluck… and he had an idea to use it to steal treasures from all over the four corners of the globe…"

"Wait, you mean all he had to do was somehow feed a picture in of anywhere in the world, and walk through the doorway, and he'd be there?" Lori asked. "Fascinating!"

"DM's brother agent #6 was on the case, and unfortunately he got there first… but as DM was called in to help… because he'd been captured, the Baron fed in a picture of some remote location… and pushed #6 through. DM tried to shatter the wretched thing, but his brother was gone… and the picture was incinerated in the explosion, so they had no idea where the Baron had sent him… and he was never heard from or seen since!"

"Oh dear," said Lori. "I had no idea!"

"Quite a shock to all of us. He hardly ever talks about it much. It happed nigh on 5 years ago…" Agent 57 shivered. "I was watching him as he was captured by Greenback, in the disguise of a dust bin that Stiletto took into their ultra secret HQ, and I managed to radio Colonel K to send Danger mouse…"

"Ohhh," she whispered. "MIA?"

"Presumed missing… the poor blighter," sighed 57, looking forlorn. "#6 knew the job was dangerous when he took it, just like DM did. Entered the force just two years after DM did. He looked up to his older brother so… but it's a rather sad story…"

They stopped at the door to Fifi's dressing room, seeing her name with the gold star over the door. Lori glanced back at 57 to continue his story, but he quickly cleared his throat and said, "I believe this is the place… I'll wait outside for you…"

"I really WOULD like to hear more, if you're up to telling…" Lori whispered to him. 

"Sad story for another day," he waved it off, a look of guilt on his face. She wondered how he managed to disguise himself so effectively. She'd have to ask Dangermouse about that sometime later. Raising her hand she knocked on the door, and heard her cousin's voice in reply.

"Entrez vous," said Fifi. Slowly Lori opened the door on her cousin, who was just touching up her makeup. Both mice looked at one another for a moment, and a smile came over her face.

"Lorraine, it has been YEARS!" she gushed as she held out her arms.

"Oh my GOSH, you look great… I'm SO sorry I never…" Lori got out, but her older cousin hugged her, slowly rocking her back and forth. "Darn it…"

"I'm so glad to see you, my beloved cousin… I have heard SO much about you," she whispered giving Lori a squeeze and they kissed each other on both cheeks in greeting. "You've become quite a young lady, let me look at you…"

"All those times I got tickets to see you, and could never make it, I feel like such an idiot!" Lori mumbled as Fifi took a good look at her.

"Say nothing, cheri," she tksed. "The secret agent business is a dangerous one, no? And we are together now… and there are so many old times to catch up on, no?"

"Oh yes," Lori smiled. "But I wish I hadn't carried that around with me… I feel so silly…"

"Family is family," Fifi smiled graciously as Lori still held her hand. "And are you making sure Monsieur DM is behaving himself, oui?"

"He doesn't talk much about you," said Lori, with a flush.

"Ahh, zat is his way," she said with a small sigh. "To protect me, most of all. And unfortunately zat is why I have sent ze letter after letter to vous, and nothing was ever sent back to me… and it was best that you'd continue to defend the free world. For I knew zat vous would want to come and sing the beautiful music with me…"

"Mademoiselle L'Amour, you are on in five minutes…"

"Zut alors I am coming!" she called back to the director. "I have someone VERY important here with me… no?"

Lori smiled, wiping another tear away, and said, "I'm just so glad to see you again… there is so much to tell you…"

"And zat we will have time for later, cheri," said Fifi, giving her a hug. "I weel walk with vous to the stage door, no?"

"Let's go," she smiled. "And I just couldn't' believe the look on his face when he saw me all slicked up, because I could SWEAR I looked like a younger you…"

"We are much alike, no, in appearance?" Fifi smiled as she walked out, and 57 saw both of them standing there.

"Good heavens, it's like looking at twins," said 57. "Two lovely ladies…"

"And I am looking at zomeone who should not be here, but is?" she asked, with a questioning look.

"Oh, that's just a disguise, he's my date…" said Lori with a flush. Agent 57 picked up Fifi's hand and kissed it, and she smiled with amusement, tempered with sadness.

"Hmm, a very handsome likeness…" said Fifi slowly. "And your gentleman should be taking you back now, and we will meet after the show. Until then, cheri…"

She walked past them, giving Lori a final hug and kiss on both cheeks as she let the stage manager escort her back onstage for the second half, leaving Lori and a very chastised 57 looking oddly at her. "Ahem, perhaps I should find another disguise?"

"Take me back to the box, and maybe I can have a few suggestions for you," Lori said sweetly.

"It was rather foolish, but I did want to look my best. And I didn't wish to resemble DM again…" he coughed. "But it was… for your benefit…"

"It was sweet of you," Lori said, kissing his cheek. "And I know by now appearance doesn't matter. Especially when you're a master of disguise."

"Ahem," he laughed awkwardly. "Shall we?"

"I always DID wonder how you managed to change, or is that a trade secret…"

"If you'll wait but a moment," he said, ducking into a broom closet. Who emerged next was a rather good likeness of Redford Roberts, a handsome hamster actor that Lori knew from her youth. She giggled.

"What?" he asked innocently.

"Now it's like dating my brother," she giggled. "I was in the circus with him…"

"ER…" he said.

"No it becomes you," she smiled taking his hand. "And I'm sure it won't upset DM as much as looking like his long lost brother #6…"

"One more moment," he said, ducking in again. He reemerged as the spitting image of Sean Conroarly, the famous movie actor who was a lion, silvery gray mane that played James Bond in many a film. Amazingly the tuxedo looked very much the same, although it had grown to fit the larger handsome lion.

"Very nice," she smiled. He towered over her a bit, and smiled slowly, offering his arm. Sliding hers into his, he escorted her back to the booth. 

***

Penfold and Bagel were sipping lemonade, and DM was slowly nursing a martini. He saw Lori returning with an older, but very handsome lion from many a silver screen flick, and gave a sigh of relief. "57, glad to see you've had time to change…"

"Sorry about that mix up DM," he said.

"Don't mention it," DM smiled. "So, Lori, did you…"

"It's rather personal, but I do hope she's going to stay around…"

"Oh she'll stay around all right," Penfold said, before Bagel clapped a hand over his mouth. DM shot Bagel a thankful look.

"I'm rather glad you shushed him," DM said to her with a slow grateful smile. "Because it saves me the time…"

"The concert's about to start again," Lori whispered as the lights flickered and they took their seats again. Penfold, mollified, sipped his soda rather noisily through the straw, and DM groaned as he put his hand over his face and shook his head.

"Good grief," he mumbled.

Little did they know that another figure was watching them from the sidelines, waiting to make his move? Fifi L'Amour was JUST the subject he needed in his latest scheme, and he was dying to get to her before DM was. Pulling the lapels of his red coat around his face, he slipped back past the red curtains where he had been standing when 57 and Lori had returned to the box. Elusively he tiptoed towards the staircase and down the main steps to the backstage to Fifi's dressing room. Unaware, DM and the others continued to watch as Fifi again took the stage, and wrapped the audience in her spell.

****


	5. Penfold and Bagel

__

Disclaimer: Dangermouse and characters are property of Cosgrove/Hall productions, and I don't own them. This fiction and the characters of M6 Lori L'Amour and her assistant and other craziness the other side of the pond is my own insanity, property of me, Trynia Merin. I've been having THIS on my brain forever, and pardon the raw form of this fanfiction. 

****

A Long Overdue Date

__

Part 5

By Trynia Merin

This story takes place after Two of the Best, and Two of the Worst 

**********************************************************

After the last curtain call, DM waved to his friends, and they walked after him quickly. He went over to one of the nearby ushers, and whispered into the ear of the fellow, a large cocker spaniel. Nodding the cocker spaniel in the red uniform waved them past security and they wandered backstage to Fifi's dressing room. Reaching into the nearby fridge he pulled out a large bouquet of roses, and handed them to DM.

"Don't' hang about, let's go," DM said. "We don't want to miss her now do we?"

"I can think of a few reasons why you don't want to miss her," Penfold said slyly before Bagel put a hand over his mouth playfully.

"Put a lid on it… you want us to get in trouble again from your chaperone?" she whispered.

"Crikey no," Penfold whispered back as he took her hand and rushed after DM. Agent 57 and Lori were following the two hamsters, and people in the orchestra filing off the stage looked in admiration at the shapely white mouse and the handsome lion who escorted her in the black tuxedo. Didn't he look familiar?

"Blimy, it's Sean Conroarly," mumbled one of the nearby groundhog trumpet players. "And that gel looks JUST like Fifi…"

"I hope she's a sister, cause Miss L'Amour is already in her dressing room…" whispered the cellist, a young deer to the groundhog, who couldn't keep his eyes off Lori as she walked along. The usher knocked on Fifi's door, and DM waited, watched by Penfold and Bagel.

"Someone here to see you, Mademoiselle L'Amour," said the usher.

"Send them in…" she said. Dm was first in the door, and Lori saw the sparkle in her eyes as she rested them on DM. Unlike Lori she had blue eyes, and her hair was immaculate. DM strode up to her, and kissed her hand, handing her the roses, as she leaned forward and greeted him with a kiss on either cheek. He took her hand and turned to the others, coughing a moment.

"Lori, you already know…"

"You were wonderful," Lori smiled.

"Do come in, all of you," Fifi urged, and Agent 57 closed the door behind them.

"Shall I wait outside?" asked 57.

"No, you can come in," DM said a bit flustered. "This is my assistant Penfold… and Lori's assistant Bagel… and this is one of my co workers…"

"Ma'am," said Agent 57, kissing her hand.

"You're the best," Bagel gushed. "Can I have your autograph…"

Fifi smiled and signed autographs, before DM said, "Let's not fluster her. She's just had a long performance…"

"Shall we all celebrate with dinner, as you suggested?" Fifi asked. "There is a banquet at the Grand Hotel, for all the performers and their guests…"

"Unless he wants to be alone," 57 whispered to Lori.

"My limousine is waiting," she said meaningfully. "And I'm certain it will fit all of us… there is safety in numbers, and you are all my guests…"

"The mark iii…" Penfold pulled DM's sleeve.

"Will be fine," DM whispered. "Do try not to blurt things out like a loon, Penfold… shush."

Rapidly they were all escorted out the back door, where a long black limousine pulled up. One after the other they climbed inside, DM taking a moment to help his ladyfriend with her wrap. The three couples all sat in the limo as it rode along, and the only open gesture of affection DM seemed to show was reaching out to clasp Fifi's hand. However the way in which they looked at one another spoke volumes, for each gaze seemed to say a thousand words. She immediately began to entertain them of tales from her tour of Europe, and they all listened interestedly as the limo pulled up to the hotel, where the members of the orchestra were already filing into the large banquet room for the wrap party. The limo driver tipped up his cap and gave a slow smile. However, as he pulled away he failed to notice as someone suddenly rose from the seat in a blur of color, and held up a small vial, spraying it in his face. Before he could lose control, a long foot stuck out and hit the break as the dark shape looked carefully at the unconscious driver. Features blurred and he suddenly took on the appearance

"I'll be waiting, M6," he murmured. "When you come back, I'll be waiting, and then I'll have my revenge…"

"I have you now, Fifi L'Amour," said someone as they slid into the door, and looked at the limo driver in puzzlement.

"WHO are you?" he asked, suddenly loosing his concentration and shifting to his original form. Which left the would be assailant flummoxed. 

"WHAT is this, your not her driver?" asked the fellow in red, looking strangely at the limo driver. "I missed them?"

"Excuse me, are YOU after them too?" he asked, suddenly.

"Yes… but… who…"

"A master of disguise," he said slyly. "And you look familiar. Wufgang is it?"

"You've heard of me?" he asked.

"Yes, your attempt to erase all the worlds music was a good attempt at best," he said. "I congratulate you… and I assume you have some nefarious scheme involving the singer?"

"Yes… but…"

"I offer my assistance, for a 50/50 cut, and the chance to get rid of Agent M6. She's the white mouse with the rather large goon in the tuxedo, who is NO movie star… and the female hamster with DM's assistant is her assistant… a rather annoying little thing, with a mouth on her that wont' stop!"

"Granted. I had wondered who he was with…" said Wulfgang slowly. "And what assistance pray tell do you offer me?"

"You're working with a professional," said the figure, blurring back into the form of a limo driver. "But you MUST work on your subtlety…"

"Go on…" he said. "How do you propose to do better?"

"Simple, I once worked in America, during the scheme of the pilfered music contract for a famous pop group… they went missing for WEEKS, and by the time the Backsheep Baahs knew they were missing, they were FORCED to sign under my label," he whispered. 

"You sir, are a virtuoso…"

"And a music lover. The music of cold hard cash… and with it you can have POWER… and buy all the record companies and force them to promote your music, and your music alone…"

"I had hoped to capture Miss L'Amour, and use her spellbinding voice for my hypnotron…"

"Greenback tried that scheme before," said his would be partner. "And he failed. But with MY help you will succeed, if it IS based on her voice… but first you need MY help to capture her… This is what we do…" The two enemies began to plot, comparing notes about their enemies and when they last met. As they shook hands, Wulfgang smiled slyly, a wicked gleam in his eyes, when he heard the plan.

***

"DM, what do I do?" Penfold whispered as he pulled DM's sleeve. Fifi stood with many of her fellow performers, who were all fawning over her with compliments. Some even had programs for her to sign for their relatives and guests.

"Penfold, ask her to dance, really," DM sighed, trying to be as patient as he could be, while wanting to have SOME time to himself. Fifi stood by Lori as she signed programs, and the two cousins were talking quietly about various singing techniques.

"My voice teacher, he says to rest every day for an hour, non?"

"You do both classical opera and pop, that's quite an accomplishment," said Lori.

"Miss L'Amour…" said another performer. "I must have your autograph…"

"Everyone, please, give the lady some room. Let's have a dance shall we?" her manager said as he shoed everyone away. A small group of hired musicians began to play a waltz, and the members of the orchestra paired off with their dates and guests onto the wooden dance floor. A sea of black tuxedos swarmed with the colorful gowns of the guests. 

"Incredible," said Lori. "Haven't seen this many suits since the agent's ball… or can I tell you about these things…"

"I am sworn to secrecy, no? Since I am the belle of a certain top agent… and you are my cousin, also a top agent. What better person to entrust your secrets to?"

"I missed you so much," whispered Lori.

"And I too, my belle cousine," said Fifi, pressing her hand. "All the good things you have done… you saved Danger Mouse and much of the free world. He had told me of your bravery…"

"Are you going to be staying for a few days?" she asked. "And would you like me to um… as the English say, bugger off tonight so you and he can get caught up?"

"That is sweet of you, chere," she smiled. "And you and I can go shopping tomorrow… I shall show you ALL the best places in London…"

"Miss L'Amour may I?" asked an adoring maestro, a young squirrel, and she turned to Lori with a helpless shake of her head.

"Ahem, I believe she is with me," said DM as he moved up, and gave the squirrel a look that clearly said, "Back off… or get lost…"

"Someone save me," she laughed, and DM held out his hand to dance. 

"Shall we?" he asked, as they started to play the tango. Immediately she took his hands, and they were off on the dance floor together. With great precision the two white mice moved and spun with the music, DM's athletic lean body gracefully counterpointing with Fifi's easy gliding grace. Together they seemed poetry in motion, tempered with their footsteps moving like clockwork. Other couples began to join in, and Lori watched, as her cousin seemed lost in her own world. It was said that two people dancing was indeed a very close way to bond and communicate without words being spoken. What was the nature of DM and Fifi's relationship? Seeing them dancing together, she knew the answer.

"Err, would you like to um… dance?" Penfold asked, swallowing his nervousness, but knowing that there were others of his height and stature out there making a hash of it.

"Sure," said Bagel. "And don't worry, I won't laugh or anything. AS long as you don't' laugh at me. The last time I danced in this type of music was at my cousin Lenny's bar mitzvah…"

"I only know tap dancing," Penfold blushed as she took his hand and they stayed at the edge of the dance floor and simply held hands trying to get the gist of the beat. However there were others doing far worse, and Penfold was just glad she wasn't laughing at him. She seemed to be having fun, and he realized that there wasn't as much to be terrified about when she held his hand. He hadn't felt like that for someone else… since a rather nasty crush on a teacher in boarding school.

Lori felt someone tap her on the shoulder, and looked up to see Agent 57 standing over her. IN his present guise he was taller then her by at least a head, and he said, "Shall we?"

"Thank you," she smiled as he put his massive paw at the small of her back, and clasped her hand in his. She slid her arm around his waist, and felt the strength of his hand around hers. They moved easily together, and she was impressed by his grace despite his size. To see a large lion and a mouse dancing wasn't unheard of, but it was rather endearing. Not many could keep their eyes off the two white mice dancing in the center of the floor however, as they finished the tango. 

*** 

"Cor am I starving!" Penfold commented as they passed by the buffet table.

"You said it," Bagel answered. They forgot all about dancing as they looked longingly at all the food piled there. Each grabbing a plate they proceeded to help themselves. Anything unidentified to her, Bagel simply had to ask her date, and he'd give her a run down on its merits. A lot of the British food seemed based on meat, and she soon had slices of steak and kidney pie, fondue, and a large slice of trifle to the side of other hors-d'ouvres. Penfold piled his plate high as well, and the two of them sat at a table near the window where the fresh night air was allowed to drift in. Nearby, DM and Fifi sipped at two glasses of wine, and spoke softly to one another. They were in view of the two assistants, and Bagel couldn't help but wonder where Lori was with 57.

"What's the deal with DM anyway?" she asked Penfold through a mouth of trifle.

"Eh?" Penfold asked, helping himself to a bit of raspberry ice. "You should try this… bet they don't' have THIS in America…"

"Thank you," she said as he dolloped a portion onto her plate, which quickly filled an empty space. "But he's so… well… you'd think if two people were in love they'd SHOW it more…"

"DM's um… reserved… and most British are," Penfold said quickly. "I mean that's just how he is…"

"Heh," Bagel said slowly, and put a piece of black Forrest cherry cake on Penfold's plate for him to try. "Figures. If he showed up at my family, he'd be seen as a cold fish… not that there is anything WRONG with being reserved, but I don't see him as the type who'd even so much as do more then hold her hand…"

"DM's just DM…" Penfold shrugged. "Anyway if I'd know about such things… he's tight lipped about his private life. I'm his best friend… and there's things he's NEVER told me…"

"A shame… I know the secret agent life is… well there are some sacrifices… but even so, he doesn't really have any FAMILY does he? I mean you see your folks a lot don't you?"

"Crikey do I ever," Penfold said through a mouth of strawberry tart. "Me auntie even ran into us on one of our missions. DM was EVER so cross…"

"You ever see your parents?" she asked him.

"Em well… not for a while lately," Penfold admitted. "They er… live in the country… but they DO send me a new pair of wool mittens now and again… and me mum sometimes pops in for a visit… but DM says I have to be careful who I bring to the HQ… cause of the security risk. But time off, that's the best… home cooking, sleeping in me old bed…"

"Tell me about it. Lori didn't have much of a family, and my mom adopted her…"

"Yer mum and dad… you see them lots do you now?" Penfold asked.

"Are you kidding?" she giggled. "Too much. But I miss them. I just wondered if DM had ever told you about HIS family. This is the FIRST Lori really told me about her birth folks. As far as I knew till recently she grew up in a circus…"

"Crumbs, that's not half bad," Penfold observed. "Here, you've GOT to try this… Hang about, DM's off again… with his lady friend…"

"Probably wants some time alone," Bagel laughed.

"Still wouldn't put it past some blighter to do something crazy," Penfold mumbled. "I've got a bad feeling that we're being watched…"

"He's the greatest secret agent, right?" Bagel asked, stepping down as Penfold slowly got down off his chair. "What HAS he got to worry about… or are you curious about something else?"

"Who me?" Penfold tried to look the paragon of innocence. "Just going to check up on him, what?"

"Don't go without me," Bagel chuckled, guessing his curiosity was overriding his usual cowardice. They came to the window and saw DM walking out on the patio with Fifi. Penfold stood on a chair to see over the decorative hedges, and Bagel moved up to perch beside him. Both of them pressed their noses to the glass and watched the couple.

"He's holding her hand," Penfold said slowly.

"Very romantic," Bagel nodded as he saw them walking, and Fifi's blush as DM whispered something into her ear. She was holding a prop fan, and hiding her face behind it partly. IT reminded her of a scene from Pride and Prejudice as they walked along, very demure and discreet.

"Cor, look at that," Penfold mumbled as he saw them duck into the shadows, and they only saw them in silhouette. They stood opposite another, and intently gazed into one another's eyes. Both hamsters watched raptly as they saw DM draw her close, and what seemed at first like a chaste brushing of noses turn into something more. And they kissed, and kissed, and kissed some more.

"Reserved my foot," Bagel mumbled. "He's a regular James Bond, on and off the mission…"

"Crumbs yes,' Penfold nodded. "The blighter… he's been holding out on me… let's take a closer look…"

"And you said you were a coward by nature? At this rate you'll be a first rate spy," Bagel chuckled as he helped her down off the chair and they scampered like two innocent schoolchildren to hide behind the hedge once they scurried out the door. DM had moved from his kiss and took Fifi's arm, slowly guiding her to sit on a stone bench out from the party. There was a decorative hedge maze in the back of the hotel, and Penfold and Bagel both sneaked under cover of the planters to hear giggling and laughing as they continued to talk and he saw DM's hands clasped in hers, his arm draped over her shoulder. There was an innocence and shyness about it, tempered with the looks of great desire, as if they were holding back in what they wished to do.

"It has been a long time, mon couer," she whispered as they held their hands clasped before them.

He nodded as she whispered something into his ear in French, and he smiled shyly as he whispered something back, and kissed her neck lightly. Taking her hand he kissed it softly, moving up her arm, and she laughed lightly, stroking his cheek. Penfold's hand tightened on Bagel's shoulder, and she had to stifle her cry of surprise at how tightly it pinched. He seemed to lean out of the hedge, a smug smile on his face when he saw his chief lean over and give his ladyfriend a kiss once more. 

***

Lori let Agent 57 lead her off the dance floor, and said, "May I get you a drink, Miss?"

"You can call me Lori," she said. "We are off duty…"

"Indeed," he nodded. "Something non alcoholic, or something more traditionally British? Perhaps some wine?"

"Well why not, what the hey?" Lori asked. He went over to the table where drinks were being served and ordered two glasses of Merlot. They stood together before the window, glancing out at the open door, and he handed her the one glass.

"Wonder where DM's gotten off to," 57 chuckled with a roguish gleam in his eye. "The old fox…"

"Penfold and Bagel have disappeared too," smiled Lori. "I bet they're hitting the buffet…"

"Don't' see them around, although it does look from the evidence as if they've come and gone…" 57 pointed to the table. Lori could hear something amidst the babble of the crowd, and felt her fur stand on end. 

"Um, maybe we should look for them, just in case… you know…"

"If you like, we could get some air. There is a garden out back here…" he said, leading the way. They stepped onto the terrace where DM and Fifi had been before, and they noticed a few other couples walking or sitting out by now. DM and Fifi were out of range of the immediate sight, and Lori glimpsed them to the one side, in relief.

"Over there," she whispered. "I'd know my cousin's tiara flashing anywhere… rather romantic… isn't it?"

"Very much so," he said, craning his neck to lean over and look. Out of the corner of her eye, Lori saw something moving in the bushes and shivered.

"Cold?" 57 asked her, rubbing his hands up her bare arms.

"Forgot my coat in the car," she blushed. 

"You should have told me m'dear, I could have transmogrified a coat or something, or given you mine," he said, making to slip off his jacket.

"It's just… something's making me shiver…" she turned away, glancing around as her senses screamed danger. IT was her enhanced hearing, picking up the rustling in the bushes that was somewhere near DW and Fifi. DM was stroking the side of her cousin's face softly, and she was looking up at him, both with their white fur gleaming in the moonlight. 

"Mayhap it is something else," he said and turned her around. She looked up at him, and felt his hand on her face gently. It had been so long since a male had touched her so tenderly, and she reached up to stroke the side of his face with her hand.

"I wonder what you really look like," she whispered.

"Better not ask," he chuckled, a bit too self-consciously. "I've been known to er…"

"It wouldn't' matter," she said, squeezing his hand. "I don't judge by appearance. It's the man INSIDE that matters…"

"Very sweet of you miss," he sighed, clutching her hand tightly. Lori again shivered, but she heard what sounded like another rustling, and 57 drew her close to his body to warm her. Before she knew it she felt a soft kiss on her lips, and stopped for a moment, startled.

"I'm sorry," he apologized, drawing back. "I haven't been in the company of a ravishing lady such as you…"

"Don't be sorry," Lori said, leaning up on her toes and breathing in his face. "What mad you think I'd mind?"

"Would you mind terribly… if I?" he asked, and she answered him, standing on her tiptoes and giving him a sweet kiss that lingered. She forgot her fears for a moment, letting him draw her close and feel her fast beating heart.

***

"OH crumbs," Penfold yelped as he stumbled in the bush, and Bagel put a hand over his mouth. Fifi and DM broke from their romantic mood to turn and see the movement. "Just a moment," DM said rather annoyedly as he strode forwards.

"Spies?" she asked with a nervous laugh.

"More like nosy parkers," DM mumbled. "All right, step out of there now!"

"Oh 'eck," Penfold whimpered and felt something tickling his leg. It was a stray bit of grass, and he couldn't suppress a squeak. As Bagel moved to put her hand over his mouth, she leaned too far, and both hamsters spilled out rudely onto the lawn.

"Oops," she said, looking up at Danger Mouse.

"Penfold, what on EARTH are you doing!" DM snapped his hands on his hips.

"Crikey DM, sorry… I heard a noise and I thought you were in trouble," Penfold babbled.

"Sorry... so sorry," Bagel said, tripping as they scrambled up, backing away at the irritation in Dm's face. 

"Oh don't be so hard on the petite ones," Fifi started to laugh as she came up. "They were simply worried about us, the dears…"

"Trouble, you have no idea what THAT is… when I get through with," DM started, but stopped as she put her hand on his shoulder and slid her arms around him from behind.

"We were just going now…" Penfold stammered as he grabbed bagel's hand and quickly pulled her behind him. Her heels almost flew up as he ran with her as fast as he could to the hotel banquet room.

"Good grief," DM sighed.

"Don't be cross, mon chere," she whispered. "The night is still young, and they are curious, no?"

"Someday, that boy will be in a big mess," DM sighed. Suddenly they heard a scream, and the sounds of thumping. A loud shout came after it, and people started to shriek as a sudden sound cut through the night.

"That sounded like…"

"Stay here," DM told Fifi, and she nodded her hand to her mouth.

"Unhand me you fiends!" Lori's voice cut through the trees. Dm rushed to the sight of the scuffle, hearing grunts and shouts that sounded like Agent 57 fighting someone.

"Let her go NOW!" shouted agent 57. "Or I'll… I'll…"

"You'll take a nap," said a sinister voice, and DM had just reached the trees when he saw something clunk 57 on the head and knock him out. He crumpled, groaning as he saw stars.

"Good grief…"

"Let me go!" Lori screamed as she was dragged away by two figures. 

"M6!" Dm shouted as he rushed forwards. "Let her go!"

"You'll never see your lady friend again, unless you stop right now," said Wulfgang.

"But…" he stammered out as the other figure threw a sack over the struggling agent, and pressed something to her neck. She went limp and he carried her into a large helicopter.

"Stop right there or she dies now," came Wolfgang's threat. "So Danger Mouse, you thought you could stop my scheme, but it will be Miss L'Amour who will pay the price if you TRY to stop us now… and all these innocent people will be added to the bill…"

"You… you FIEND!" DM shouted as he shook his fist, and Fifi came running up. Everyone scattered as a loud dissonant chord sounded, and they clamped their hands over their ears. The windows shattered and the ground quaked as DM glanced up through his pain and saw the helicopter rising in the night with Wulfgang holding an accordion in his hands. The vibrations coming from it were causing the loud cacophony that was driving everyone mad. AS soon as they had vanished, DM took his hands out from his ears, and felt Fifi's hand on his shoulders.

"DM, what happened… they took Lori!" she gasped.

"They though she was you," DM whispered, and leaned over to tend to the unconscious 57. Penfold and Bagel came running out.

"Crikey DM what happened?" Penfold gasped.

"It was Wolfgang again, and he's captured Lori, and 57's had a nasty knock on the head… Fifi, I want you to go where it's safe while I contact HQ and get after them…"

"No Danger Mouse. She is MY cousin and I am going WITH you…" Fifi said firmly.

"Now don't argue… don't be ridiculous!" Danger Mouse said, whirling on her.

"Non, she is FAMILY," Fifi said, hands on her hips. "And I insist you TAKE me with you!"

"Oh crumbs," said Penfold, looking at a very shocked DM.

"Wow," said Bagel. "She's got guts, all right. No wonder she's DM's woman…"

DM bit his lip as he looked from the fallen unconscious 57 to the slowly recovering crowd. Fifi was adamant, her blue eyes sparkling with determination, hands still on her hips. Penfold and Bagel looked at one another, knowing DM might not want to disagree with her right now, if he wanted his long overdue date to continue that was!

****


	6. The old switcheroo

__

Disclaimer: Dangermouse and characters are property of Cosgrove/Hall productions, and I don't own them. This fiction and the characters of M6 Lori L'Amour and her assistant and other craziness the other side of the pond is my own insanity, property of me, Trynia Merin. I've been having THIS on my brain forever, and pardon the raw form of this fanfiction. 

****

A Long Overdue Date

__

Part 5

By Trynia Merin

This story takes place after Two of the Best, and Two of the Worst 

**********************************************************

**__**

Part 6

"Appearances don't matter to me," said Lori as she held up a hand to caress his cheek in the moonlight.

"You don't know, my dear, what you speak of," Agent 57 said under the moonlight.

"Surely someone knows what you really look like," Lori said softly, her blue eyes gleaming. She seemed like an angel from some other realm, despite the fact she was American, and normally he didn't consider dating other agents from outside the agency an option. Here he was with the power to make himself look like anything he wanted, and still it had been ages since he'd had such fun on a date. Not to mention he hadn't had a date in the longest time either.

"You wouldn't want to see my true appearance," Agent 57 said sadly, turning from her.

"I stand by what I said before," she whispered, and he felt the soft touch of her lips on his and her body close to his as her arms went around his neck, and he felt the softness of her kiss. His resolve melted and he lost himself in her arms and the wonderful warm feeling that came all over him….

"You are so beautiful," he murmured as he parted from the sweet kiss, full of promise, and looked into those deep blue eyes.

"Agent 57… cooee?" said a voice that was distinctively English coming from her lips, and he blinked, confused as he felt a dull pain erupting in his head, and the sound of a car engine running in the background. Suddenly he felt very foolish indeed, because it had been the last few memories spinning before all the lights had gone out.

Agent 57 next came around laying in the back seat of the Mark III. Penfold was sitting on his left, mopping his brow with a wet handkerchief. ON his other side someone was gently probing the large bruise there, as he and Bagel both propped him up between them. Slowly she was bandaging his head, and he had managed to retain his present form.

"Lori," he mumbled. "Where is the gel… is she all right… good lord I have got to…"

"Hey it's okay," Bagel said.

"Er could you… um, change into something smaller?" Penfold asked, as he was crammed up against the wall of the car.

"But Lori… I mean Agent M6… is in peril and it's my fault," 57 despaired.

"No it isn't, now hold still!" Bagel chided as she struggled to wrap his head in a long white bandage as he fussed.

All throughout the ride, DM and Fifi had said little, both sitting there in their respective funks. DM was a bit embarrassed and nonplussed, because she had never insisted on coming along. Agent 57 mumbled and asked everyone to close their eyes while he changed into another disguise, at lest one that wouldn't take up so much of the back seat of the Mark III. When he told them it was all right to look, they saw he had adopted the guise of a cable repair guinea pig, complete with helmet, utility belt and coveralls. 

"I'm sorry, I've got a nasty headache," he apologized. "This was the first thing that came to mind…"

"Cor, it's better though," Penfold commented. "Are you all right? You had a rather nasty knock on the head…"

"57, are you all right?" DM asked, breaking the silence from the front seat, which had dropped a few degrees.

"Yes, but Lori… agent M6… Mademoiselle L'Amour, I must apologize, I failed to protect your cousin… and now she's in great peril…"

"Don't' worry about it, you did your best," Fifi said quietly, folding her arms across her chest much like DM did.

"You mustn't beat up on yourself," DM sighed. "It can happen to the best of us. And we simply must get that bump seen too..."

"I'm fine, really," 57 said, trying to sit up straight despite the tweeting bluebirds which seemed to float around his head. "Blast it, we really must give those fiends a walloping…"

"They get theirs all right, when Danger Mouse gets his mitts on them," Penfold said as Bagel tried to finish doing the bandage and salve on 57's head. Despite the fact he could alter his appearance, the goose egg swelling on his head was pretty apparent in any form.

"What's the plan, Dangermouse?" 57 asked, still reeling from his injury.

"The plan is we get back to HQ, contact Colonel K, and see if we can get a bearing on…"

"We have to go after them," Fifi said insistently. "There's no TELLIGN what they'll do to my poor cousin…"

"May I remind you, mon cherie, that your cousin is a capable agent, and is most qualified to handle any emergency…" DM said softly. "And rushing off half cocked isn't going to help her get rescued…"

"So what are we going to do now Chief?" Penfold asked, breaking the tension.

"We're reaching HQ now," said DM as they backed into the Mayfair pillar-box, and he helped them all onto the lift, which lead up into his sitting room. When they reached the top, DM turned to Penfold and Bagel.

"Can you put him up in one of the guest rooms. I think 57 needs a bit of a lie down…"

"DM, old boy I'm fine," 57 insisted. 

"Penfold can you make some strong tea?" he asked.

"Right away chief," Penfold said, glad of something to do, and very much wanting to be elsewhere because the temperature in the room had dropped several degrees.

"And you my dear…" said DM. "Could most well do with a cup of tea… Bagel, will you see to her needs?"

"Dm I'm not some fragile flower," she said slowly. "I appreciate ze concern, amour, but I am determined to go along with you on this rescue…"

"Don't be ridiculous… I brought you back here where it's safe… and I'll hear nothing more…"

"I'm not your assistant, Monsieur Danger Mouse," she said firmly. "And Lori, she is my cousine… and I will NOT be patronized…"

"I'll make the tea, you help 57 to a room to lay down," Bagel nudged Penfold. He nodded numbly, and urged 57 to go with him. Reluctantly, but wanting to avoid the lover's quarrel, he went with the small hamster to a guestroom, while Bagel slipped out to make some tea.

"I'm not even going to discuss this with you," DM said slowly. "Your safety is my responsibility, and heaven forbid anything should happen to you…"

"I will speak to you when I am composed," she said slowly, and turned away, arms folded across her chest. "But my mind is quite made up in this matter…"

"Good grief," DM sighed. He obviously wasn't going to get anywhere in convincing her at this moment. Sighing, he said, "I am only concerned for your safety surely you must…"

"Non," she waved her hand as she walked quickly out to the kitchen. "I will here no more now. Go and do what you must do…"

Again DM sighed and headed to his bedroom, where 730 identical outfits waited for him to change into. HE caught a glimpse of her sad face as she wandered into the kitchen, and joined Bagel who was hurriedly trying to make tea. After a few minutes he came back, and saw that they were still not there. Penfold slowly came back, having changed into one of his customary blue suits.

"ER DM, agent 57 is resting comfortably… but he's rather determined to join you… to rescue M6," he said slowly, afraid to set DM off from his pensive mood.

"Thank you Penfold," DM said slowly. 

"Care to talk DM?" Penfold asked slowly. "I am sorry that I interrupted…"

"It's not that Penfold," DM sighed as he flopped down inelegantly on the sofa. 

"Ohh I see," Penfold said slowly. "I'd best get along and check to see if the girls need any help…"

"Good, I'll see if Colonel K knows anything…" DM sighed, as he got up and walked over to dial a few buttons on the videophone.

***

In the kitchen, Bagel was trying to get some tea together. She turned to see Fifi L'Amour standing there, and said, "Oh, sorry…"

"Non, do not worry petite one. I just cannot understand ze attitude of ze secret service men… sometimes…" she sighed.

"When you figure it out, clue me in on the secret,' Bagel smiled. "Look, he's being a ding bat, but it's only cause he loves you right?"

"Ah, I know," Fifi smiled slowly as she inhaled deeply, trying to calm herself down. Bagel poured her a cup of tea, and both women sat down opposite one another at the two-seater breakfast table.

"I'm worried about her too," Bagel said, reaching her hand out and pressing Fifi's hand by her cup of untouched tea. "She's like a sister to me, and if anything were to happen…"

"Zut Alors, I wish it HAD been me," Fifi sighed. "This dangerous life…"

"She's one of the best secret agents in the world," said Bagel. "If anyone can handle herself it's her… next to DM of course…"

"Of course… but I do not like this… waiting around…" Fifi glanced in the direction of the parlor, where they heard the voice of DM reporting to Colonel K, and the Colonel's responses. "I wish I could DO something… I am not helpless, you know?"

"Well, you don't have to like it," Bagel said. "And anyway, maybe you might feel better with a snack, and a change of clothes. I'm sure Lori has something she wouldn't mind you wearing…"

"Ah Bagel, zat is the perfect idea," Fifi suddenly perked up, a smile coming over her attractive face. Bagel suddenly realized how much like Lori's her eyes were lighting up, and she shook her head.

"Um, you're not thinking what I think you're thinking are you?"

"IT depends, Bagel, on what you think I'm thinking you're thinking about… sacre bleu this is confusing! Where is Lori's room?"

"This way," Bagel said, getting up and showing her the way. Fifi followed her to Lori's guestroom, and let her inside. She opened the doors and showed several casual outfits, and a multitude of Lori's uniforms, neatly pressed. There were at least 100 there, identical and spotless white and blue.

"Merci," she nodded. 

"I'll just be in my room, getting changed. If anything happens, we want to be ready…" said Bagel, walking to the door as Fifi glanced over the outfits. "I'm sure she has a pair of jeans and a T shirt… but there isn't much else to make do with…"

"Oui," Fifi nodded. "I shall find something for the occasion no? And merci for your help and sympathy. I can see why mon cousine admires you as her best friend…"

"And I can see what side of the family she gets her determination and passion from… not to stereotype, but are ALL you French so passionate?"

"Oui," she nodded as Bagel left her there, pondering the contents of Lori's closet. As Bagel crept to her room she couldn't help but wonder what was on Fifi's mind, because she could see the wheels turning in Lori's cousin's head. If she was any bit as determined and stubborn as Lori was, DM could be in for QUTIE a problem ahead.

***

"So, your date was interrupted by Wolfgang?" Colonel K asked as he cleared his throat.

"Yes Colonel. Apparently he had some sort of sound weapon, and he was working in concert with someone else…"

"Good Lord DM… I had just heard a report that he had gotten out of the slammer… but our agents have picked up intelligence reports that Cam-Elion Rex is holding Fifi L'Amour for ransom…"

"Good grief," DM sighed, and then suddenly an idea came into his mind. "Wait, Colonel, is he really CERTAIN it's her?"

"Well he seems insistent… and well, he's threatening to take over the world unless his ransom demands are met. And he wants YOU to deliver them in person… or else…"

"I'll get right on it Colonel. Penfold?" DM asked.

"Be careful DM," said the Colonel. 

"I always am, especially now… but that isn't Fifi that they have… it's m6…"

"Good show…" said Colonel K, looking surprised.

"But you see if we let them believe they have the real Fifi, then perhaps we are holding a trump card," DM said. "Because the real Fifi is safely here. And Agent 57 and Bagel are here to protect her. I'll just take Penfold, nip over, and we can drop the bag on those two…"

"Good show," Colonel K said. "Over and out…"

"Over and Out. Penfold?"

"DM aren't you going to have a spot of tea?" Penfold asked, ducking out of the kitchen in his apron.

"No time for that. We've got to move…"

"OH not that lift again," Penfold groaned as DM dragged him to the lift. "And what about… her?"

"I'm going now!" DM called. 

"Zat is YOUR choice DM," came the reply. "I told you I would be coming… and I'm almost ready!"

"Sorry Fifi, but I can't do that," DM said as he quickly leapt on the sofa, and slid down the elevator shaft with Penfold. "You're staying here where it's safe… come on Penfold…"

"Oh heck DM won't she be cross?" as they disappeared just as Fifi rushed in.

"Come back, you _idiots_! _Trez stupid_…" she shouted, and started yelling in French at DM. By the way DM blushed Penfold guessed it wasn't the most flattering of words spoken in the language of love.

"She'll have to understand it's for her own good," DM said slowly, shaking his head. "I can't risk her… it's too dangerous…"

***

Bagel rushed out of the bedroom when she heard Fifi's shout. As she turned she saw the star was wearing gone of Lori's uniforms, and it fit her perfectly, for they were the same size more or less. Her hair was pinned back much like M6, and for a brief moment, if not for the blue eyes, they would have been identical twins.

"What happened, the NERVE…" Bagel got out.

"Men," Fifi sniffed. "He left. I knew he would… Sacre Bleu! And I was thirty seconds from finishing the getting ready!"

"What do we do now?" asked Bagel, leaning down to buckle her Birkenstock Mary Janes she always wore on her missions with Lori.

"WE must find zee way to follow them, non?" Fifi said, slowly pacing around.

"I don't 'know…" said Bagel. "They took the only car… and well…"

"Perhaps I can be of assistance," came a British accented voice. Agent 57 stood there, with the bandage still on his head, but he looked very much like DM's long lost brother #6.

"Dressing for the occasion, are we, Monsieur 57?" Fifi asked, a hand on her hip.

"That freaks me out," bagel jumped. "Tell me HOW we're going to get there without a car?"

"Lori's wrist watch," Fifi said, reaching down to show Bagel. "It has the remote control to her super secret auto does it not…"

"But that's in the repair shop," Bagel stammered out.

"Not QUITE true," 57 coughed. "Apparently the Boffins have fixed it ahead of schedule, due to British automotive genius. And I think I recall seeing it at the HQ…"

"Oh no, you're not thinking…" Bagel groaned.

"WE must go after them. 57, can you drive this sports car?"

"Just watch me," he said with a determined laugh as he took Lori's wristwatch and strapped it on his wrist. "Now the recall button should be here…"

"Oy vey," Bagel groaned as she soon heard the sound of a car engine, and she looked at her two friends. 

"Is this how DM does it?" Fifi asked as she moved to the sofa and sat down. 57 and bagel sat on either side, and it was enough weight to get the lift to go down, at a quick rate. They all spilled into the Gail 6, which had backed up at the foot of the slide. 57 got behind the wheel, and he was wearing a pair of goggles, helmet and a scarf like a WWI flying ace.

"Hold on ladies… I got it I think…" he said as he started the car, and they roared out, into the night.

"Au secors!" Fifi shouted as she hung onto the car for dear life, and Bagel moaned as the wings extended and they were airborne. She reached into her pocket to find the case she had put there, for her contact lenses. She had seen a few items in Lori's room, and Bagel barely noticed that Fifi's eyes were not blue, but now pink, exactly like Lori's eyes would look.

"Oy, here we go again," Bagel moaned, making sure her seatbelt was secure. 

***

Lori slowly shook her head as the sack was removed, and she was dumped unceremoniously on the floor. She glanced up to see Nevermore standing over her, in her black ninja guise, and felt the extra strong ropes binding her wrists together. All in all she was trussed up like a Christmas turkey.

"Ahh, the famed Fifi L'Amour," said Wolfgang. "To think but a mere costume change would make you deceive us. But you will grace us with your beautiful voice, and have the chance of a lifetime that you denied me… in turning down my affections before…"

"Are you quite certain this is the right mouse?" Cam-Elion asked. Lori suddenly got her wits about her, and glanced up at her captors. An idea dawned in her mind, and she glanced from one to another.

"Zut Alors!" she shouted in French. "This eez an OUTRAGE. I demand to see my manager!"

"It sounds like her," said Wolfgang.

"But still," Cam Elion glanced at her carefully, but she glared back at him, still in her blue gown and hair, her makeup thick and attractive. "We must be sure. She looks VERY similar to Agent M6…."

"What eez this?" Lori demanded in a perfect imitation of her cousin's accent. "You cannot hold me here… Danger Mouse… he will rescue me, and vous will be most sorry indeed, non?"

"The plan is simple, Mademoiselle," said Wolfgang. "You will cooperate, or things could get very nasty. I require your aid. Someone of your performing caliber is essential to my plans…"

"What he means is…"

"Au secors, you are vile scoundrels indeed!" Lori shrilled, and started to curse at them in fluent French. 

"No doubt you'll change your tune soon enough. For Agent Dangermouse and England will pay handsomely for your return. Or else the French government will pay to get you back," said Cam Elion. "Either way, we win. But if you DO cooperate, those you love most dearly will not suffer the consequences when they come after you!"

"Monsters!" she spat, kicking wildly. "You well NEVER get me to cooperate!"

Wolfgang sighed as he took Cam Elion aside and whispered, "She is a diva, and you must handle this with the utmost delicacy. I cannot have her voice damaged… if she continues to scream like that… she'll ruin it…"

"Then we must stop that, before I get an ear ache," Cam Elion mumbled. "Nevermore, kindly silence our guest…"

Continuing to shout unflattering epithets in French, she knew Nevermore was behind her, but instead of reacting, she fumed as Nevermore slipped a gag over her mouth, silencing her. Slowly nevermore hoisted her to her feet, and she glared daggers at her two kidnappers. Wolfgang sighed and strode over to her, lightly running a finger down her cheek, "Mademoiselle, you should reconsider. Because if you DO cooperate, you might have the crowning star in your tiara. Just think… the world will be your oyster…"

"Save the pleasantries for later, Wolfie," said Cam with a sneer. "I'm going to perfect your little toy, to make SURE it will deliver. You've got a few bugs in the design…"

"The plan was to use her voice as the perfect harmony, to lure the world to my whims," Wolfgang said angrily, as Cam Elion motioned to the huge organ console with pipes spread here and there.

"This design though brilliant is the work of an amateur. And most of it is copied from Baron Greenback. You wouldn't want him suing you for patent infringement would you? As I recall, he used a very similar device only it was loaded with bagpipes…"

"That is impossible!" Wolfgang snapped, scandalized. 

"Evil geniuses DO tend to repeat the usual take over the world plots. But I am different. I am an original. Do you want to go down in history as the one who used a recycled world domination scheme?' Cam Elion asked as he changed back into his green form, with his tan suit and Dockers pants. 

"Philistine, I will not treat her with any less respect. For she is an artist," Wolfgang snapped. "And if..."

"Cool your artistic jets, Wolfie," said Cam Elion, not impressed. "Face it. Without me you wouldn't have the diva. And you'd be another second rate has been under Danger Mouse's…"

"Boss, Danger Mouse… he's approaching," Nevermore pointed to a bleeping light on a nearby computer console. Cam Elion rushed to the keyboard and punched a button, showing the Mark III with DM and Penfold behind the wheel.

"Thank you. Now DO try and convince your… protegee to cooperate, if you're SO inclined, while I sort out your invention," said Cam Elion. "And I'll prepare a suitable welcome for your arch rival…"

"I shall return," said Wolfgang, as he took the struggling 'diva' from Nadine Nevermore. She backed away at the glare in the lion's eyes, as he escorted their 'guest' out of the room.

"Are you going to let that mad musician push you around boss?"

"He's just a stooge, in my plan. You think I'd let a rank amateur deprive me of the glory of defeating Danger Mouse?" Cam Elion rolled his beady globes for eyes. "Really!"

"No boss," Nadine grinned. "So how are we going to settle his hash?"

"Plan B-6," said Cam Elion. "I'm sure he won't recognize it…"

"Great, that's my favorite," smiled Nadine as she trotted off to get ready. Cam Elion smiled at her, and then turned to the viewscreen.

"Very soon, DM, you'll be a foot note in history. And your precious diva girlfriend will be my ticket to a world domination tour. Either way I'm holding ALL the cards, and you're going DOWN for the count…"

"Philistine," mumbled Wolfgang as he cut Lori's bonds. "I must apologize. I had no intention of harming you. But I must convince you that I only want the recognition classical musicians like me and you deserve. And I cannot understand WHY you chose the realm of pop… but I will overlook it."

All he got was a glare from the 'diva' in response. He sighed and showed her down the hall to a comfortable cell, with Louis XVI furniture, where he sat her down in a chair, and locked her hands to the chair arms with a pair of golden cuffs. "Now my songbird, you will learn my creation. And at the time when my machine is complete, you will sing, and the whole WORLD will fall under your spell…"

All Lori could do was continue to glare with a look that meant, "When donkeys fly, you jerk!"

***


	7. 57 to the rescue!

__

Disclaimer: Dangermouse and characters are property of Cosgrove/Hall productions, and I don't own them. This fiction and the characters of M6 Lori L'Amour and her assistant and other craziness the other side of the pond is my own insanity, property of me, Trynia Merin. I've been having THIS on my brain forever, and pardon the raw form of this fanfiction. 

****

A Long Overdue Date

__

Part 7

By Trynia Merin

This story takes place after Two of the Best, and Two of the Worst 

**********************************************************

Dangermouse and Penfold flew along, the former glancing periodically at the radar, while the latter glanced sidelong to judge the mood of his chief. He didn't want to interrupt DM's mood, but at the same time he felt he had to say something to break the silence. Clearing his throat he said, "DM… how are you going to track M6? Some super secret tracking device?"

"Well let's just say I took the liberty of giving her exactly what you described. IN case the two of us were separated, and one of us was in peril," said Dangermouse. "And I had suspected Cam Elion or Greenback might seek revenge for our last defeat of their nefarious plots…"

"But wasn't the device in her watch, cause I don't think she wore it…"

"Fortunately it wasn't. It happened to be in that string of pearls she was wearing, her and her assistant."

"Cor, I WONDERED where those came from?"

"A little thank you gift from Colonel K," said Danger Mouse. "The tracker is in the set of pearls. And I'm hoping that whoever captured her will be foolish enough to mistake her for Mademoiselle L'Amour…"

"Oh come on, why don't you say it?" Penfold asked.

"Say what?"

"Your lady friend?" Penfold asked. "What's all this British reserve about, eh?"

"Penfold I don't want to risk further danger by…"

"Oh go on," Penfold laughed. "I'm not the enemy here. I'm your best friend. If you cant say that around me… who can you say it around chief? I'm not as DIM as you let on, you know…"

"Coming from someone terrified on his first date that he has to check up on me?" DM said irritably.

"Now don't go getting cross with me, Chief," Penfold said back. "How was I to know that I'd fall out of that bush!"

"You interrupted a very tender moment," he said annoyed.

"Still rather it be me then Wulfgang, right, chief?" Penfold asked. "I mean she MIGHT have gotten captured if…"

"I do admit Penfold that your dumb luck stopped Fifi from peril. But it also brought on the insistence that she put herself into danger for the sake of her cousin," DM said.

"Ah touchy aren't we," Penfold mumbled. "I'm not the one who disappeared into the park…"

"Penfold, shush," DM mumbled.

"All right, all right," Penfold mumbled. "I'm going into a state of shushiness…"

"Good, now where is that blighter… ah… there we are… they're headed toward Coventry. Can't think why on earth… unless…"

"Unless?" Penfold asked, waiting for the chief's deduction.

"Unless whoever captured them wanted to find the remotest spot… so as not to be discovered when striking from a distance…"

"OR else they wanted to keep clear of 'nosy parkers', DM?" Penfold asked. "Or they're trying to corner the world sheep market?"

"Really Penfold," DM sighed. "There we are… let's hope they haven't spotted us…"

"Think again, chief," Penfold gasped as he pointed at a bright radiance, shimmering in their direction. "Cor, a bit late for fire flies…"

"What?" DM asked as a cluster of bright objects suddenly swarmed around the Mark III. "Good grief… there aren't any fireflies up here…"

"Tell them that!" Penfold mumbled as they clustered around the Mark III and began to send small beams of light in their direction.

"Good grief!" DM gasped as he narrowly swerved to avoid the blasts. Each firefly's light seemed in reality a very fine laser and each beam was sizzling precariously close to the mark III.

"Now what?" Penfold cried.

"We've got to outmaneuver them…"

"We're going to be Swiss cheese… oh CRUMBS!" Penfold howled, hanging on as a beam sizzled right over their head. The entire sky was crisscrossed with the beams, and DM found that no matter what he did, he was soon encased in a cage of them. Steer one wrong way, and the heat sizzled at the wingtips.

"That's NOT one of Greenback's techniques… it HAS to be the work of Cam Elion!"

"What good's THT going to do us?" Penfold groaned, clamping hands over his glasses.

"I suppose we'll have to let ourselves be captured, get into his hideout, and find out in person…" said DM.

"I was afraid you'd say that!" Penfold whimpered as DM realized they had to keep pace with the cage of interconnecting lasers. One drop in velocity or speed up could riddle the Mark III full of more holes then a typical plot of a badly written Hollywood screenplay.

"Like the laser show?" came a taunting voice, an American accent behind it that crackled over the videophone of the mark III.

"Frankly, I think it rots!" DM said angrily. 

"Oh, you hurt my feelings. I devised this special trap JUST for you," taunted Cam Elion, his face flushing red with pride on the small screen. 

"I presume this was for OUR benefit?" DM asked.

"Just keep pace with the lightening bugs and you'll be allowed to land. "But try getting out of this mess and you'll BE a mess, Danger Mouse…" Cam Elion said with a leering grin. 

"You win, for now," said DM through the loudspeaker of the Mark III. 

"Good, I knew you'd be reasonable. And what is a laser show without a soundtrack. And you've got front row seats, platinum pass to one of the world's best… with someone WELL acquainted with you…"

"You fiend, if you harm ONE hair on her head…"

"I won't. But that will be up to you, Danger Mouse…" said Cam as the video screen clicked off. Grimly DM gritted his teeth as he brought the Mark III into the big circle that came into view. He saw the runway lights leading up to it, and noted that the fireflies were dropping in speed. He had to carefully match the velocity of his car to keep in the laser cage. When he finally landed, Penfold still had his hands over his eyes.

"You can look now, Penfold," DM said gently. "We've landed."

"Cor, what a relief… oh fiddle… bars!"

A large cage rose up from the circle around them, and the fireflies winked out around them, leaving them in semi dark. As the cage descended on a large circular platform, DM glanced at Penfold, trying to poise himself to leap out of the car. However he stopped short of jumping up when he noticed the fireflies had perched around the top ring of the circular cage, beaming a crisscross of lasers on top. 

"Good Grief, he's smarter then I thought," DM mumbled in appreciation as they slid into the ground, and the circular top of the shaft closed with an ominous clang.

"Trapped in the dark… ooh crikey," Penfold moaned.

"It's not THAT dark…" DM mumbled as he glared up at the lightening bug prison above. "All right, now what?" He shouted into the dark, illuminated only by the red glow of the lightening bugs overhead.

"I will ask you to step out of the car, and into the light. A hole will open in the bars. Be a good guest and step through, or else my contraptions will fry you where you stand…"

"Very melodramatic, isn't he chief?" Penfold whispered to Danger Mouse.

"Come on Penfold, chin up," DM said, leaping out of the car and standing near Penfold, who dropped clumsily to the ground. There came a clanging sound as a bright spotlight flicked on, just outside the cage, and a small door swung open on its own accord.

"Is it just me chief, or does this… fellow seem a TOUCH creepier then Greenback?" asked Penfold, rushing after DM as he stepped into the spotlight.

"Keep up with the light, and you'll be safe. If you don't, you'll be the target practice for my pets," Cam Elion's voice boomed around them.

"You don't frighten US, you Yank!" DM shouted defiantly. "You'll have to do better then THIS to get the drop on us… when I find you…"

"Temper, temper. I can see you've not lost your touch for snappy hero patter since we last met…" the voice laughed as Dangermouse strode confidently in the circle of light. Penfold whimpered and kept close behind DM. For a moment DM held his hand out, only to almost be singed by a red laser from the cluster of lights buzzing around them.

"That's not a way out," DM mumbled. 

"What do we do?"

"Play his game, for now," DM whispered to Penfold. "Keep close… this might be a bit sticky…"

Penfold moved closer as DM walked, and he saw his chief slowly reaching for the badge on his chest. He turned his head, and masked his voice with his hand as he said, "When I tell you to drop, drop, and when I tell you to run, you run, got it?"

"Right chief," Penfold whispered. They continued along for a ways, till they went through a few circular doors. When at last they reached a few steps leading up, and several passages leading off, DM glanced up to see the light that had been directing them was on some sort of a track system. The fireflies were keeping exact pace, and he nodded to himself that his assumption had been right.

"Penfold, drop!" he shouted, holding up his badge as he stopped. The laserbeams sizzled past them, and DM held up his badge to deflect the beams upward. All the beams skittered as they hit his badge and radiated up into the ceiling, causing a blinding crimson flash. Penfold clamped his hands over his eyes and huddled behind Dangermouse.

"RUN!" DM shouted, grabbing his assistant's hand and they raced up the stairs as quick as they could. They stopped finally, panting as their chests heaved up and down, the sound of distant laser and explosions resounding downstairs.

"Cor chief, that was amazing," Penfold said appreciatively. "Thank goodness your badge…"

"Has a reflective surface in the reverse," DM nodded, and then tossed it from one hand to the other, realizing it was still hot as he dropped it. "Ohh blast, it's hot…"

"Allow me, Chief," Penfold said, reaching for his pocket-handkerchief and picking up the smoking badge in it as DM held his stinging hand. "You all right DM?"

"Ohhh, apart from a rather nasty burn, I'll be all right… good grief that's hot!" 

"Um, DM I don't know if it will help, but I did save a few of those packages of lemon and butter in me suit the last time we ate at the fish and chips shop… there was no room for 'em in the glove compartment…"

"I'm not going to ask WHAT on earth you did that for," DM gasped as he held his hand and Penfold opened the packages and rubbed the butter on DM's burn. "But I'm strangely glad. Now let's find M6 and get OUT of here!"

"Right…" Penfold said. "After you chief… and oh… em… this is yours…"

"Thank you, Penfold," DM sighed as the burning started to subside and Penfold reached up to pin the badge on his chest. 

"Cor that's a nasty burn, let me," Penfold said, and wrapped his handkerchief around DM's hand in a makeshift bandage. Sighing Dm patted his friend on the head and led him on. Sometimes he had to admit that Penfold wasn't as useless as everyone thought.

***

"You have heard my masterpiece," said Wulfgang as he played the small electric organ in the cell that held Lori. He had seemed to swallow the bit of fiction that she was her cousin, but had not loosened the gag from around her mouth. She continued to glare as he played his eclectic melody, which grated in her ears worse then, anything she had previously heard. M6 hoped that someone would come soon and distract the villains so she could make her move. Yet there seemed little chance of that, and her head was splitting, so she decided not to wait any longer.

Slowly she snaked her telescopic tail around and slid the tip into the lock on the handcuffs. With a small click they popped open, and Wulfgang continued to sing deeply, in his thick German voice. Lori did have to admit he had a good voice, and his style might be better suited on a punk or neo metal stage.

As he continued to play, he didn't notice as she let the cuffs drop, and reached up to take the gag off her mouth. She quickly aimed a blow at the back of his neck, and as Wolfgang turned around, he saw her in shock. The last thing he saw were stars brighter then the ones he wished were on his dressing room door, and he crumpled at Lori's blow. She grabbed the cuffs and clicked them around his ankles and wrists, nodding to herself in satisfaction. The poor fool.

"Now, let's get out of here," she said to herself and rushed out the door. She was glad her skirt was short, for running in a long ball gown would have been a royal pain. When she darted out into Cam Elion's control room, she saw that Nevermore was rushing inside. She ducked behind the computer terminal and waited as Nevermore made her report.

"You let them get away?" he shouted.

"I didn't know he'd figure a way to stop your firebugs!" she snapped.

"Then get OUT there and FIND them!" he snapped. "Or I'm cutting your cable privileges! No more Jackie CHAN!"

"Sir, you're so cruel," she sighed as she grabbed her weapons and rushed out of the room, leaving Cam Elion there to brood. He turned around as he saw a shadow out of the corner of one of his independently rotating eyes.

"Who's there…" he snapped. Suddenly he disappeared from view, blurring, as he became totally invisible.

Lori gasped, and hid, her ears trying to pick up the minute vibrations of his heart and breathing as he moved about the room, only a shimmer. AS he continued to move, she heard his heartbeat and footsteps coming closer, and then dodge out from behind the terminal as she felt his hot breath near her ear.

"Curse you, how did you get away from...never mind… apparently you're far more resourceful then I thought, Miss L'Amour…" he said. "But you can't fight what you can't see… and I don't think YOU are capable of…"

"Guess again, idiot!" she said in a French accented voice as she cartwheeled out of the way as a laser beam shot out of nowhere. She saw one of the buttons on the control panel she had ducked away from had been depressed, and guessed Cam Elion was there. Quickly she cartwheeled and sent her feet crashing into mid air, and heard the meaty thump as her feet made contact and Cam Elion groaned as he crumpled to the floor. Still not completely out for the count, as Lori stood over him, he swept out his tail and tripped her, and Lori rolled out of the way as another laser zinged past her.

"You can't escape from me, you diva," he snarled, reaching at his hip as he again vanished. Though his head ached, he blended in the best he could and vanished once more from her sight. Lori still heard him nearby, the floor vibrating under her feet. She glanced left and right, struggling to hear from what angle he was approaching. Guessing he was toying with her, Lori again flipped and landed by the control panel of the large hypnotron. She guessed that it was perhaps the device, for she saw the large W over the control panel shaped like an organ console. Hastily she started glancing over to try and see if she could somehow disable it.

"GOT you!" said Cam Elion as a switch clicked down, and large metal clamps came out of the console, clamping down on her wrists. A dragging thump made him become visible, as Lori struggled to free herself.

Inching along like a caterpillar, Wolfang dragged himself into the room, complaining, "She escaped, the minx escaped…"

"You idiot," said Cam Elion. "She's right here, and she's not going ANYWHERE…"

"You… you fiend!" she cried, almost forgetting to use a French accent. Cam Elion released Wolfgang and dragging him to his feet.

"Hurry up and get her to sing, you klutz," he said. "While I fire up the hypnotron's power source…"

"Stop right there you villain," said Danger Mouse as he burst into the room, Penfold in tow.

"Oh terrific," Wolfgang mumbled as he sat behind the console. "I thought you'd said your ninja henchbird would take care of Danger Mouse…"

"Release her at once ore…" Danger mouse shouted, rushing up to Wolfgang, with Penfold rushing behind him. 

"I don't think you realize whom you're dealing with," said Cam Elion as Danger Mouse glanced around futilely. 

"You villain, show yourself, I know you're here!" said Dangermouse. "It's going to take more then your parlor tricks to stop me…"

"Oh really?" Wulfgang asked as he suddenly played a dissonant chord on the accordion to his left. DM and Penfold clamped their hands over their ears as a stream of loud sound shot through. Lori gritted her teeth as DM and Penfold moaned. Cam Elion suddenly came out of hiding, and fired a small object at them. From the roof, Nadine Nevermore dropped, throwing a net over DM and Penfold, snaring them.

"Godo work Wolfie," said Cam Elion as the noise faded, and both hero and his assistant groaned, struggling in the net. Nadine wrapped the net up tightly, and then turned to bow at her boss. 

"And you said I was an amateur," he laughed.

"If you don't help us, Miss Lamour, Danger Mouse will suffer the full weight of my new composition… so now you have incentive…"

"Monster," she said angrily, realizing to let them know her true identity would put Danger Mouse and Penfold in danger. Especially when Nadine and Cam Elion were hanging the net with DM and Penfold onto a hook on the ceiling, and slowly punching buttons on the console. In the floor opened a trap door and a hot source of fire began to slowly come to life, flames licking higher and higher.

"Full size sterno," said Cam Elion. "Perfect for basting super heroes…"

"Don't do it!" DM cried. "You can't sacrifice the world for us!"

"Choice is simple, Miss L'Amour," said Wolfgang. "Either sing my song as I have played it, or else Danger Mouse and Penfold are roasted…"

Lori sighed as she looked down at the music. If they found out she really couldn't sing in they way they expected, it could be trouble. And yet, she hoped Danger Mouse had some sort of plan. Taking a deep breath she slowly nodded. "Very well, start playing," she said slowly.

"Oh no," DM gasped.

"Trust me, non?' she called to him. "The composer, he needs an introduction non? Or shall I reveal to him the true nature of my abilities…"

"But she isn't," Penfold started before DM silenced him.

"Penfold shush," he whispered. "You can't let him get away with this… not when the free world is at stake!"

"I will do it," she whispered. "Begin please…"

"Very well," Wolfgang laughed as he began to play, and Cam Elion and Nadine Nevermore looked on, slowly keeping their hands on the controls of their panels should Dangermouse try to escape. A loud organ solo rumbled through the complex, vibrating it under their feet, as Wolfgang threw back his head and began to play the piece that he had played before. Lori took a deep breath, hoping she could stall them long enough before DM figured out how to get out of his current predicament, or if she could think of something fast. Her eyes wandered all over the organ console, taking it in as the clamps held her arms fast, and her tail slowly telescoped out and probed everywhere. 

"Penfold, do you still have some cotton wool you use to put in your ears when I snore at night?" DM asked him.

"Cor yes," Penfold said, pulling it out and passing it secretly to Dangermouse. He stuffed it in his ears, twisting his body so they couldn't see what he and Penfold were doing. 

"Eh boss, I'm getting something on the radar, approaching fast," Nadine said as the prelude continued. Both had put in special earplugs to blot out the sound.

"WHAT?" he asked. Grabbing his sleeve she pointed at the bleeping light on the emergency detector. 

"Deal with it," he typed on his monitor. Nadine bowed and rushed off to figure out who their new visitors were. DM noticed the bleeping light, and glanced down at Penfold. Was it possible that Agent 57 and Bagel were coming to the rescue? He had forgotten that they might tip the scales in favor of their rescue. But if Lori began to sing before they arrived, would they be free of the range of the hypnotron? At the very least it might distract them long enough for him to figure a way out of the net that imprisoned them.


	8. Conclusion

__

Disclaimer: Dangermouse and characters are property of Cosgrove/Hall productions, and I don't own them. This fiction and the characters of M6 Lori L'Amour and her assistant and other craziness the other side of the pond is my own insanity, property of me, Trynia Merin. I've been having THIS on my brain forever, and pardon the raw form of this fanfiction. 

****

A Long Overdue Date

__

Conclusion

By Trynia Merin

This story takes place after Two of the Best, and Two of the Worst 

**********************************************************

"Ohh, what is that rumbling?" Fifi groaned as she heard a distant vibration.

"Sounds like an organ," Bagel said.

"Blast, it sounds like Dangermouse has failed to stop them," 57 said.

"Wait, what was the weapon supposed to do, Monsieur 57?' Fifi asked him.

"Use your voice to put people into a trance," said 57. "But if you're here…"

"WE had best stop up our ears, non?" she asked. "Bagel are there any earplugs in the auto?"

"Glove compartment," Bagel said. Frantically Fifi dug through the compartment and managed to get out pairs for everyone by the time the organ tone overrode them. A vibration shook the Gail 6, and 57 tried desperately to stop it.

"Hold on ladies!" he shouted.

"WHAT?" asked Bagel.

"C'est'se?" Fifi shouted. They felt the rattling of their teeth as a sudden wave hit the car, and glanced down below to see the ground quaking beneath them. 57 barely managed to land the car as it skittered and spun out of control, then bounced on the hills below as he struggled to bring it into a landing. There came a terrific crash, and airbags deployed to stop them where they were. Slowly they struggled out of their seatbelts as the Gail 6 hissed with steam and smoke. 

"Great, another 2 weeks at the garage at least," mumbled Bagel.

"What?" 57 asked.

"Never mind," Bagel mouthed as she pointed to a tall menacing shape. It looked to be a large set of speakers, ten stories high that had popped out of the side of the hill. 57 changed himself into a racehorse, and knelt down so the ladies could climb on his back. Breaking into a run he sprinted as quickly as he could toward the vibrating rumble.

***

"Now, sing my songbird, sing!" said Wolfgang.

Lori opened her mouth and looked at the Latin words. She began to sing, but her voice suddenly sounded very different as it spilled out of her mouth. Something in the melody reminded her of one of her favorite songs, and she began to sing it very loudly.

"Shout it, shout it, shout it out loud!"

"That's not the right song!" Wolfgang shouted. "And you… are not she…"

"That's right, dumb-dumb!" Lori shouted, sweeping her tail out and wrapping it around the organ swivel stool. She spun the screw, sending Wulfgang up nearly three feet then whipping the stool around so he spun like a top. The organ stopped playing, and Lori quickly moved out her feet, barely able to touch the organ stops with her feet and tail to push them off and try and stop the organ tones.

"Thank heaven for that," Penfold mumbled as the organ stopped.

"What's going on here!" Cam Elion shouted. "Wait… you're not…"

"That's right, sucker, joke's on you!" Lori shouted. "You just captured a secret agent!"

Wulfgang's stool crashed against the organ console, spilling him rudely on the keys, to play a dissonant chord that rumbled the entire hideout. Lori struggled against the clamps to get free, as Cam Elion rushed up toward her.

"M6! I should have KNONW it was you!"

"Where else for a needle to hide, except around a bunch of other needles," she said, twisting her wrists as she tried to lodge her tail into the clamps to get free. However, they tightened, and she was left trying to pull free. Dangermouse struggled to untie the strands of the net, but they were forged of titanium.

"Blast, titanium," DM shouted.

"What?" Penfold asked as DM pulled the cotton wool from his ears, and Penfold's.

"This net is titanium… I can't…untie it… unless…"

"Curse you!" Cam Elion shouted as he rushed up toward Lori. Picking up her feet she kicked him back, her legs connecting with his torso as she pitched him back into the organ console onto the already groaning Wolfgang. They landed in a heap, stars and planets orbiting the villains aching heads. Sparks began to fly from the hypnotron, and Lori was right next to it.

"Crumbs DM…" Penfold shouted. "What do we do…"

"Blast it…" DM wrestled with the titanium wires. "I can't… quite… Lori, use your tail to get free…"

"I can't," she shouted. "These clamps are too… hard…"

"There must be a switch," DM shouted. "Feel about with your telescopic tail!"

"Ohh chief hurry, I think that smoke doesn't mean anything good!" Penfold whimpered.

***

"Over that way, smoke!" Bagel pointed to Agent 57, who was breaking a sweat as his hooves pounded into the ground. They covered the hill rapidly; dodging past a series of lights that had suddenly flown around them.

"Mon dieu, UFOs?" Fifi gasped, hanging on.

"No, Cam Elion's firebugs, and each has a laser… watch out 57!" she cried. No longer needing their earplugs they pull them out as 57 dodged each laser, panting.

"This is dirty pool what?"

"Do you have a mirror?" Bagel asked Fifi.

"But of course… I see what you are thinking," she said, reaching into her pocket and pulling out the compact mirror. She had stuck it into her pocket quickly thinking to powder her makeup. Bagel grabbed a compact mirror out of her pocket as well, and both of them deflected any lasers sizzling their way up into the glowing swarm.

"Last stop, villains, secret plots, and finish line!" 57 shouted as he bolted up between the speakers and rushed to the source of the smoke. "End of the line!"

"C'mon we have to find them, I have a bad feeling they're down there somewhere…"

"You'll have to go through me first," said Nevermore as she landed before both women agents. Her nunchukas whirled wildly as she advanced on Fifi and Bagel.

"Sacre blue," Fifi gasped.

"OH really?" asked someone, and she glanced over their shoulder to see a menacing shape rise, with a roar. A huge bear suddenly gnashed its teeth at her and she glanced up in disbelief.

"You think THAT scares me? Get real," she sniffed as she looked up.

"No, but this does!" Fifi shouted as she hauled back her fist and clocked Nevermore in the face. It was a sucker punch, but it felled the raven flat on her back. Before she could recover, Bagel grabbed the cuffs that Lori stashed on her belt and snapped Nevermore's wrists behind her back while Fifi threw the weapons away.

"WHERE IS DANGER MOUSE!" Fifi snapped as she put her foot on Nevermore's chest. "If you don't' tell me now... I shall be exceedingly angry!"

"You can't threaten me…'

"Is that a non?" Fifi asked, and then started to sing a very loud piercing note, enough to shatter glass, right in Nevermore's ears. Bagel and 57 clamped their hands over their ears.

"No…no…s top, anything but that!" Nevermore shrieked.

"Then tell us WHERE they are now!" Fifi said angrily. "Or I'll be forced to do an ENCORE!"

***

Inside, Cam Elion and Wolfgang were still unconscious. DM struggled in vain with the fibers, and Lori couldn't find the release switch with her tail. She desperately glanced at the two agents in the net and shouted, "I can't find it…"

"BLAST and botheration!" DM shouted. "If only I had my wire cutters on me…"

"Need a hand?" someone asked as a large and angry bear busted the door down.

"Agent 57!" shouted Dangermouse. "Just in the nick of time! We've got to get free… and Lori…"

"I can't reach the switch!" she cried. 57 rushed over and quickly smashed the console with a large bear claw, and freed Lori. 

"Allow me," he said, helping her down.

"Thank you," she panted, glancing up at him. "Now DM…"

Bagel and Fifi rushed in, and she gasped when she saw Dangermouse and Penfold in the net snare. "What do I do?" she asked.

"There's a switch or a button somewhere," Bagel said, showing Fifi where the console was. They pressed all the switches before the net dropped, and 57 knocked them clear of the large sterno can. 

"Fifi, what on EARTH are you doing here?" Dangermouse gasped. "It's too dangerous…"

"Rescuing you!" she cried.

"Penfold, are you all right!" Bagel shouted as Fifi and Bagel dragged them free of the net.

"OH thank goodness," he gasped rushing over to her and almost knocking her over with a hug.

"Save the arguments for later, we have to get OUT of here!" Lori shouted. 57 grabbed the unconscious villains and threw them over his massive bear back, as Lori pushed DM and Fifi before her, and Penfold and Bagel ran after them, hand in hand. Grabbing Fifi, DM picked her up and ran as fast as he could, while Lori grabbed Bagel and Penfold, running at top speed as the complex exploded to pieces around them. They stopped running at a distance to see the whole thing go up ion flames and explosions.

***

For miles around the blaze momentarily lit up the countryside. All agents gasped as they watched the aftermath. "Good grief," said DM, still holding Fifi in his arms. She drew in her breath as she saw the fire and smoke rising into the night. 

"Oh crumbs, the mark III!" cried Penfold, as Lori set him and Bagel down on the grass. "It was back there… it'll be smashed to pieces!"

"Not quite," DM said, gently putting Fifi down and hitting his wristwatch. Suddenly the shape of the mark III rose up from the pit, almost unscathed except for a few dings and smoke damage.

"That's a lucky break," Lori said, and then turned to 57. "Thank you for saving us… you were terrific…"

"All in a day's work," 57 smiled as Lori leaned up and kissed his cheek. 

"Lori, thank heavens you are al right!" Fifi said as she rushed over and hugged Lori. The two cousins rocked back and forth hugging tightly.

"Cor, that was magnificent," Penfold said glancing at Bagel, who smiled at him. "57 to the rescue, with the gels, who would have thought it!"

Fifi and Lori released one another and turned to the others. DM glanced at Fifi, who was standing there, with her arms folded over her chest, and Bagel turned and said, "Danger Mouse, don't' you have something to say to her?"

"I… em… I'm sorry I underestimated you, my dear," Danger Mouse said slowly to Fifi, putting his hand on her shoulder. "I was only trying to protect you… and I do apologize…"

"Mon Coeur, you were only doing your job," she said as he turned her around and looked at her with sadness in his face. She reached up to brush the smudges of smoke off his face, and smiled slowly.

"Do you forgive me? I mean this wasn't QUITE what I had in mind when I suggested…" DM said.

"Shh," Fifi laughed. "It was most… interesting…"

DM coughed and took her in his arms. He sighed and decided the heck with feeling self-conscious. Drawing her close he felt her arms go around her neck, and she gave him a kiss. Penfold and Bagel looked on as Lori and 57 did as well. Their kiss continued, and Penfold said, "Er, I hate to bring this up, but how are we going to get back to London in just the mark III…"

"I do apologize for appropriating your vehicle," 57 said as he tied up the villains with a length of rope in the mark III. "I did borrow it from you…"

"The Gail 6?" she asked. "You mean it's fixed?"

"Ah yes," he nodded, handing her watch back to her. She held up her wrist to put it on, and he did so. She then leaned up and threw herself up into his arms and gave him another kiss on the cheek. Despite the fact he was a huge grizzly bear he momentarily forgot h himself and wrapped her in his arms to return the kiss to his cheek, then set her down when he realized that Penfold and Bagel were watching and laughing. Lori blushed.

"Isn't that sweet?" Bagel laughed. As she watched the scene before her, Penfold got up his courage and gave her a quick peck on the cheek, and she blushed.

"Thank you for saving me life," he said awkwardly.

"You're welcome," she smiled, and gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Poor Penfold blushed and then keeled over in a dead faint.

"Poor chap," said Danger Mouse as he broke out of his embrace, and looked at Penfold lying there, and Bagel desperately trying to fan his face, as he lay unconscious. 

"Let's go home… there is STILL much of the night to be spending together," Fifi said to him, and he nodded. 

"How badly IS the Gail 6 busted up?" Lori asked him.

"Well, you might need a new paint job," said Bagel, glancing up as she patted Penfold's hand and waved her handkerchief in his face.

"Oh,' she said, and glanced up at a very mortified master of disguise. "Well at least it wasn't us…"

"Let's go home," said Danger Mouse. "After I call Colonel K and get someone to mop up this mess…"

"You and your date go on ahead, I think we can manage here," said Lori with a smile, nudging 57.

"Quite right," he nodded.

"But poor Penfold…" Bagel groaned. "I feel so awful…"

"C'mon, let's bring him along… he's had enough excitement for one day," DM smiled as Bagel helped him pick up Penfold and put him in the back seat of the car. She sat down next to him, and Fifi and DM got into the front seat. 57 and Lori watched them fly away toward London and then turned to look at one another.

"It's going to be a long time before they show up," 57 said, with a cough. "I do hope that I wasn't… too forward in my… demonstrations of affection…"

"Why don't we talk about it while we wait?" Lori said with a smile. "Besides, I think I'd like to hear just HOW you became a master of disguise…"

It had been a long time since anyone but his co agents and DM had known, but he figured it was as good a time as any to tell someone else. Especially the young American agent who seemed to be very interested in him as well as his career. This could be the start of a very beautiful friendship, a very deep and intense one. 57 smiled and said, "Well, it's a bally long story, m'dear… but it all started…"

****

The Mark III pulled up to HQ, and stopped to drop Bagel and Penfold off. Slowly he came round, and saw Bagel looking down into his face as he lay on the sofa, concern in her eyes. "Ohh heck…"

"I'm sorry to make you faint," she apologized.

"Don't mention it, I rather enjoyed that…" he laughed nervously.

"First kiss huh?" she asked. 

"If I say yes, are you going to be cross with me?"

"Of course not, I think it's sweet," Bagel said with a smile. An awkward silence came between them, and they both blushed.

"Well, ahem… would you care for a spot of tea?" Penfold said, wringing his hands.

"Now that's the perfect end to a first date," she smiled. "And you can tell me about your Auntie in the states… and I can tell you about the crazy trip my parents took to the Caribbean…"

"Cor, can you show me how to make that apple tart?" he asked.

"Apple pie," she corrected as Penfold got up off the sofa, and helped her up. They walked off to the kitchen as they heard the Mark III roar off, and knew they were alone in the HQ.

As Penfold boiled water and searched for tea, Bagel began to get the ingredients down. Both were still shy from the kiss on the cheek they had given one another and both were unsure of how to proceed. What made matters worse was that DM and Fifi had left to continue their date elsewhere, leaving them with the whole run of the place. She knew that the kiss he'd given her on the cheek was sweet, and he must still be terrified, and terribly shy. So they had to take careful steps to see what would happen next.

"Um, you realize that DM's up and left?" Bagel asked.

"That means we have the telly all to ourselves," Penfold said as he put out the tea service and Bagel continued to knead the crust for the apple pie. She took a rolling pin he handed her and began to roll out the dough as he grabbed some flour to toss over it, and a pie tin she could throw it into. Adding the glazed apples to it, she waited as he turned on the oven and helped open it for her as she stepped up and tossed the pie in.

"Now, what shall we watch?" she asked, feeling the awkwardness abate somewhat. What better way to see how things went then to just keep things as they were, then see what developed later? AS the pie baked, both of them sat on the sofa with various treats and tea, laughing at the late night comedy shows. They both talked on about their families at length, simply comparing notes, and trying to avoid shy glances. For now they were just comfortable spending time like this, like old friends. Just what would happen next they would just wait and see, and both nodded in silent understanding that this felt rather comfortable as it was… for now.

***

DM and Fifi stood together in Hyde Park, holding hands and looking at the stars. They turned to one another and smiled. As their bodies pressed close and their hearts beat, they knew that they had seen each other far less then they wanted. And Danger Mouse whispered the silent question, "How long will you be in town?"

"A few weeks before I return to Paris…" she whispered. 

"I am sorry I misjudged you, but it's only because… I care for you so much and if anything was to happen to you…"

"I know mon Coeur," she whispered, kissing his cheek. "But if something were to happen to you, I would be equally grief ridden… so we must make each moment count…"

"Indeed," DM said slowly. "And I do intend to do that…"

She took his hand and they sat down on the meadow together, simply enjoying their closeness as they relaxed, and the night wore on. They didn't' cross the line that most would have been tempted to, but their lips found one another's, and their hands clasped tightly as they spoke of their future together, and the next time they could see one another. Still Danger Mouse kept the one question that might seal them together as one from his mind. IT wasn't now. Because he'd been badly shaken in almost facing death, and he knew that the right time would come. Not tonight, but not too much longer. There was so much to consider first…

But the long overdue date was finally ending in a way that they both wanted… and as the morning sun rose on the two sleeping figures curled up in the Mark III they knew they would face it together… in some way. Even if they were miles apart they were just right for one another. But a deeper commitment would have to wait till Danger Mouse could breach the subject they both wondered most about.

The end… for now…


End file.
